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Weekend Newsstand: April 28, 2012

It's the day you've waited all week for...it's Saturday! How does it feel? As good as you thought, or a little anti-climatic? We know, it's kind of a let down after all the build up. Just try to make the best of it. Also, here's some news: Mayor Rob Ford will have his day(s) in court this fall; Toronto's budget surplus is a few million more than anticipated; Bob Barker is sick and tired of the Toronto Zoo's shenanigans; Dancap Productions set to take its final bow this fall; possible arson at a local high school; and limited subway service downtown this weekend.

A court date has been set for Mayor Rob Ford’s conflict of interest case. The case, brought to court by prominent Toronto lawyer Clayton Ruby on behalf of Toronto businessman Paul Magder, will be heard in September by Superior Court Justice Charles T. Hackland. Mayor Ford has been accused of violating the Municipal Conflict of Interest Act for financial gain. If Mayor Ford is found guilty, he may be removed from office. So, yeah, kind of a big deal.

Looks like Toronto is richer than we think, or richer than we’ve been led to believe. According to reports, an announcement will be made Monday that Toronto’s year-end surplus for 2011 is $292 million, which is $138 million more than the original estimate by City staff during budget talks earlier this year. The majority of these funds will likely go towards replacing the City’s aging streetcar fleet, something that Mayor Ford might liken to the ongoing war on cars. Perhaps he can take the money in cash and use it to “make it rain” all over his toy subway at home before he has to spend it on real live streetcars. We’re kidding. We don’t actually know if he has a tiny subway set in his basement. Reports of this have been unconfirmed.

Uh oh. Bob Barker’s mad, and this time it has nothing to do with snipping or sewing your pet’s nether regions. The retired television host is once again upset with the Toronto Zoo’s handling of the three aging African elephants that were set to be shipped off to a rescue centre in California. Barker, who has promised to fund the move, is threatening to pull his $880,000 if issues are not resolved. In turn, Toronto is threatening to send Councillor Giorgio Mammoliti (Ward 7, York West) out to tour the elephant sanctuary. Scary.

Looks like it’s curtains for Dancap Productions. Aubrey Dan, the producer that brought Toronto Jersey Boys, Avenue Q, American Idiot, as well as a number of other stage performances, will be exiting the theatre scene’s stage left this fall. That diabolic laughter you hear outside is David Mirvish, happily plotting his ongoing takeover of the world Toronto.

Well, this is shocking. Looks like that fire at Danforth Collegiate and Technical Institute may have been arson. Arson? At a high school? During a school day? Truly shocking that this could have been the cause. Truly. Shocking.

A quick reminder that there will be no subway service between Union and Bloor this weekend. Yay! Isn’t public transit fun? Well, guess what people, life’s tough. Hasn’t Mark Towhey taught you anything? Perhaps you should take his advice to get to know your neighbours and share a taxi.

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