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Cops Caught With Crops, Peeing In Shops, Comic Gets Props

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Two Toronto police officers, along with three correctional officers and a real estate agent among others, were arrested yesterday for producing and distributing marijuana during a takedown of 63 grow ops across the GTA. Torontoist has made a principled decision not to make jokes about police malfeasance, mainly because our real names are printed at the bottom of each post.
Remember that time you were shopping and had to go to the bathroom really bad, and the store manager said “Sorry, we don’t have a washroom here,” and you almost peed your pants but just barely made it home in time? Howard Moscoe heard about that and is determined to enforce the requirement for retailers to provide public washroom space in the city.
It looks like Ontario’s economy is suffering so much that we’re on the brink of a recession, following a dip in the GDP of 0.3%. On the bright side, this is only terrible news for Ontarians who know what “GDP” stands for. Wait—that’s everyone.
The Province is petitioning Ottawa to allow Las Vegas-style, single-game sportsbook betting in Ontario’s casinos in order to boost revenues, and also possibly to add to the number of problem gamblers who are suing Ontario’s casinos for $3.5 billion for making it too easy for them to gamble. The good news is if everyone gets their way, the gamblers will be able to put their $3.5 billion on the Lakers to beat the spread.
Finally, Toronto funnyman Seán Cullen totally rocked it last night on Last Comic Standing, where he advanced to the Hollywood stage. Let this be a lesson to you kids: it’s always worthwhile to write songs about porn, no matter what your grandparents say.
Photo by Iguana Jo.

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