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That’s Crisp, Baby

An apple a day
Say good-bye to your mushy Macs, tart Grannies, foreign Fujis, and sweet Ladies, and say hello to your new favourite apple, the Honeycrisp. Known to aficionados as one of the sweetest and crispest apples around, the Honeycrisp is just starting to make its seasonal appearance at farmers’ markets and better fruit boutiques throughout the city.
Honeycrisp apples are a bit of an open secret among those in the know. Many lust after the delicious treat, but few are willing to spread the gospel lest even more converts begin demanding a share of the limited local crop. Both vendors at the East York Farmers’ Market sell out of Honeycrisps early in the morning on market day, leaving stragglers to pick among the week’s harvest of overrated Royal Gala and Empire apples.
Honeycrisps are not only the best snacking apples you’ve ever had, but their singular taste and texture can make otherwise ordinary recipes pop. Of course, reality insists that there be a flaw behind all of the hype. Sure enough, all is not perfect in the world of the Honeycrisp. Its primary weakness is that it isn’t really suitable for eating in polite company: if the ear-shattering crunch of every bite doesn’t annoy people, the sounds of your orgasmic lip-smacking pleasure certainly will.
So get out to your local market, buy a bushel or two of Honeycrisps, and lock yourself in your basement for a week. Then do yourself a favour and feed your Red Delicious leftovers to the squirrels.
Photo by Word Freak from the Torontoist Flickr Pool.

Comments

  • Steven Chabot

    Why all the hate on foreign apples. The world is going multicultural and hybridized, and that is why the Mutsu/Crispin is the future of apple-kind, and the only apple I eat.

  • Val Dodge

    Ah Crispin, the boring beige frock of the apple world to Honeycrisp’s technicolour dreamcoat. The bland gruel to Honeycrisp’s 7-course feast. Hey, as long as you like it…

  • rek

    Foreign apples have to be shipped here by boat and jet, so hate them for the petrochemicals they consume coming over from New Zealand.

  • guest

    Those in the know, know that russets are one of the best.
    Of course, we aren’t having orgasms while munching on them, so perhaps it’s time to trade up to the seemingly libido-boosting Honeycrisp.
    Anyone know where else they are available?

  • guest

    Loblaws Forest Hill (396 St. Clair West at Bathurst) currently has Honeycrisps for $1.49 a pound.

  • guest

    Loblaws Forest Hill (396 St. Clair West at Bathurst) currently has Honeycrisps for $1.49 a pound.