culture
Every Kind of Local Pokémon Story, Classified As A Pokémon
There are way too many Drowzees.
Photo by Ryan from the Torontoist Flickr Pool.
It’s three weeks into the great Pokémon Go craze of summer 2016, and if you want to get into it, you’ve probably signed up for the game already.
Everyone else can observe the game with detached bemusement by checking out the daily Pokémon Go stories that pop up. In fact, there are enough genres of these stories to classify them, and try to organize them—which we’ve obviously done.
Here’s how to identify the various Pokémon stories, their traits, and what Pokémon they are most like. Local trend journalism: try to catch ’em all!
Absent-Minded Players
From Pokémon Wiki.
The players in this genre of story are everywhere, cause eye rolls, and make you wish they’d just give up already. That’s right, these Pokémon Go enthusiasts are obviously Drowzee, which is common and unimpressive. Stories in this genre include a near-collision north of Toronto where a woman who was playing Pokémon Go at 2 a.m. was almost hit by a driver who was also playing Pokémon Go. Please, leave the battles to the local gym.
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The Pokémon Entrepreneurs
Horrifying image from Best Ever Albums.
Where there’s a trend, there are local entrepreneurs who try to capitalize on it until they realize their business model makes no sense. Such is the case with “Pokémon Go chauffeurs” and “Pokémon Go egg hatchers.” They’re basically dog walkers, except the dog is your Pokémon Go account, which is sad. These proud capitalists are the Mr. Mime of the Pokémon Go media world: desperate for attention, and kind of scary.
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The Pokémon Exercisers
So much exercise. From Pokémon Wiki.
The stories about these Pokémon Go players are really positive. These people are earnest, and the game has them walking and exploring the city like they’ve never done before—and it feels good. These individuals are most like the muscle-bound Machop, as they love this whole “fitness” thing, and are really keen for more. Can you feel the Pokémon pump?
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When Pokémon is Eerily Appropriate for City Life
Photo by Corbin Smith. We’re sorry, little buddy.
If Jane Jacobs were alive she might write an essay about Pokémon Go. Maybe something about the ballet of the Pokéstop, or the benefits of the eyes on the Pokémon gym. Maybe we’ll read a thinkpiece about it on Slate later. In the meantime, there are plenty of sightings about how Pokémon Go speaks to city life, and gets players to see their city in new and old ways. Torontoist‘s own Corbin Smith spotted a Gastly hovering over a dead raccoon, a scene that Buzzfeed called “the most Toronto thing ever.” For capturing the essence of urban life, these stories are closest to Rattata.
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#Brands Jump on the Pokémon Bandwagon
Sometimes #brands will hitch themselves to the latest craze, trend or meme in an authentic and kind of sweet way. That includes the City using Pokémon Go to educate Torontonians on how to respect the ravine system when looking for Pokémon, or the Zoo taking photos of their animals hanging out with augmented reality creatures. But then there are other #brands that feel they need to be a part of this, but don’t really get it and it falls flat. These #brands are like Hypno—they may be human-like, but you should avoid eye contact lest it lure you in.
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The Pokémon Go Local Meta-commentary Roundup
That’s this article. Since you’re already reading it, this acts as your starter Pokémon. So maybe this story is Charmander? We dunno. Have fun collecting them all, but please don’t do so while you drive.
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