The Raptors Win, The Jays Brawl, and Hamilton's Last Samurai
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The Raptors Win, The Jays Brawl, and Hamilton’s Last Samurai

Every weekday’s end, we collect just about everything you ought to care about or ought not to miss.

  • For the first time in Raptors history, the team is moving to the Eastern Conference Finals. Kyle Lowry and DeMar DeRozan combined for 63 points en route to scorching the Heat 116-89 in Game 7 yesterday. The Raptors move on to take on LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers, and Raptors fans are excited. So excited that at least one has eaten some 17 year-old cereal. Maybe it’s the breakfast of champions?
  • Bad blood between the Texas Rangers and Tornonto Blue Jays boiled over from last year’s playoffs into this season. Last night, after a pitch struck Jays slugger Jose Bautista, who you might know from the bat flip GIFed around the world (which defeated the dastardly Rangers in the 2015 ALDS). Baustista responded by aggressively sliding into Rangers second baseman Rougned Odor. Some standard pushing and shoving ensued, but then Odor socked Bautista right in the face, which lead to a dugout clearing brawl. The Jays lost 7-6, and this is the last time the two teams will meet this season. On the other hand, the Rangers second baseman is still named Odor.
  • Hamilton has a samurai, but it’s not as cool as in the movies. A man was arrested outside of a 7/11 after police received calls about someone waving around a weapon. That weapon turned out to be large samurai sword. The 29 year old man was arrested without incident, and charged with possession of a dangerous weapon. He is being held without bail. So it turns out that Tom Cruise wasn’t actually the last samurai.

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