Televisualist: Proud Owner of a Secret Constitution

By Christopher Bird

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

The look we gave editorial when they suggested talking about the Christmas movies airing this week.

Monday

The fourth season of War Story commences tonight, and the documentary series about Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan is particularly relevant since several episodes of this series will feature appearances by Harjit Sajjan, our new minister of Defence (since he was in Afghanistan when this was being filmed years ago). Sajjan doesn’t appear in the premiere, but lots of other soldiers are, and it’s thematically appropriate for Remembrance Week. (History, 8 p.m.)

It’s the 2015 Hockey Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony, and Leafs fans will be able to celebrate the arrival into the Hall of Fame of former Toronto Maple Leaf Phil Housley. Okay, granted, Housley only played one game for the Leafs, the final game of his career, but it still counts! And since the next few years are going to be extremely barren ones, Hall-of-Fame-wise, for the Leafs, their fans will have to take what they can get. (TSN, 8 p.m.)

If you’re looking for particularly stupid ideas for shows, Agent X has you covered: the vice-president of the United States (Sharon Stone) has, according to a secret version of the Constitution, her own personal secret agent. This is admirably stupid, more stupid than Blindspot was stupid, and that show was pretty balls-out when it came to being stupid. (Bravo, 9 p.m.)

Legends, the Sean Bean show where Sean Bean is a human chameleon secret agent (although, presumably, not one commanded via secret Constitution by the vice-president), returns for a second season of being only watchable for Sean Bean’s presence. (Bravo, 9 p.m.)

Also returning for a second season: Kingdom, the mixed-martial-arts soap opera, still featuring Nick “last Jonas Brother left standing” Jonas in a supporting role. (Bravo, 10 p.m.)

We love Kat Dennings (because who doesn’t love Kat Dennings? Answer: bad people), but man, somebody please put 2 Broke Girls out of its misery? Please. (City, 9:30 p.m.)

Firsthand this week features a doc entitled IF The Poet, which is about a fiftysomething dude trying to win the World Cup of Slam Poetry, and if documentaries can do nothing else, they can serve to inform you that there is, in fact, a World Cup of Slam Poetry. (But it’s good. Really.) (CBC, 9 p.m.)

Showcase has picked up Billy on the Street, the TV version of that Funny or Die show, where Billy Eichner runs around the streets of New York shouting questions at random people and occasionally drags a celebrity along with him so people can goggle at the celebrity. Funny for about two minutes. Unfortunately, the TV version of this is a lot longer than two minutes. (10 p.m.)

It flirted with cancellation for a while, but The Mindy Project is back! Featuring a cameo by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, whose character is probably called “Please Watchourshow.” (City, 8 p.m. Sunday)

Into the Badlands makes absolutely no sense and it is wonderful: a martial arts show (sorta-based on Journey to the West, one of the great works of Chinese literature), set in a kind-of-America-devolved-into-feudalism, where barons loll around on Southern plantations and have private armies of killer swordsmen? Like we said, it makes no sense. But it’s great fun. (AMC, 10 p.m. Sunday)

Shomi picked up the first season of Fargo a while back and the show is a must-watch, a single-season-serving of noir that has next to nothing to do with the movie of the same name beyond being a noir set in Minnesota in winter. Martin Freeman, Billy Bob Thornton, Alison Tolman, and Colin Hanks combine for a remarkably great story. Really, everything about this show is good (and the second, completely unrelated season is shaping up to be just as good), and it’s only a 10-episode commitment, so there’s no reason not to watch it.