Televisualist: The Vikings Are Coming!
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Televisualist: The Vikings Are Coming!

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

You just know that  all these characters from Vikings think that Jon Snow is a wimp

You just know that all these characters from Vikings think that Jon Snow is a wimp.

Tuesday

Repeat After Me: A hidden-camera show featuring Scott Foley and Randy Jackson, which means it is probably the result of a TV executive’s Mad Lib. Especially if there are a lot of jokes about “fart butts.” (ABC, 8:30 p.m.)

The Duggar family, who just helped inspire an anti-LGBT discrimination bill in Arkansas, are back for another season of 19 Kids and Counting, so we can document and supplement their actively harmful existences, if only so that Donald Trump can have a shot at not being the worst person featured on television this week. Nah, just kidding, Trump doesn’t have competition. (TLC, 9 p.m.)

If you’re too lazy to watch YouTube and wish that somebody would just collect a bunch of viral videos for you, good news: Tosh.O is back for another season! (Comedy Network, 10 p.m.)


Wednesday

CBC has been promoting X Company strongly, but much of it is somewhat non-specific, so let us warn you that this show is not, in any way, related to the X-Men. It is, instead, a show about spies in World War II. One of them is really smart (but not a mutant) and a couple of them are good at fighting (but no adamantium claws). Kinda disappointing really. (8 p.m.)

Swamp People returns for a sixth season of us not even remotely pretending we ever watch it. (History, 9 p.m.)


Thursday

Cougar Town is back for its sixth and final season of telling stories about people in their 40s who drink too much. (It’s a comedy!) (City, 8 p.m.)

The latest iteration of The Odd Couple features Thomas Lennon as Felix and Matthew Perry as Oscar, and, we have to say, casting Matthew Perry as Oscar is casting against type considering that he’s all but perfected playing the fussy, anal-retentive nerd. (CTV, 8:30 p.m.)

Two and a Half Men finally goes away forever and what is that? Oh my god, it is the sound of songbirds! Meadowlarks, I think! Spring has come early and the long darkness has finally risen from our souls! Across the world a billion people sing in unison, in every language spoken on this precious, life-sustaining orb, that the long siege has at long last ended! (CTV, 9 p.m.)

Vikings returns for a third season of being much better than a show that only exists because somebody saw Game of Thrones and said, “Let’s do our version of that” should ever have been. (History, 10 p.m.)


Friday

If you missed the three and a half hours of self-important wankery that was the Saturday Night Live 40th Anniversary Special, good news: NBC is re-running it! And likely will many, many more times! (8 p.m.)


The Weekend

Live from Tinseltown, it’s the Academy Awards! This year, the big awards fight looks to be between Boyhood, which is a mostly unprecedented ambitious work that took more than a decade to film and is also really good to boot, and Birdman, which sharply divides audiences but it’s a movie about how people who make movies are really important, and given that the Oscars love to give awards to movies about how people who make movies are really important (see: The Artist, Argo, etc.) it is thus a serious contender as well. Neil Patrick Harris hosts, though, so that should be fun. (CTV, red carpet pre-show at 8 p.m. Sunday with main awards starting at 8:30 p.m.)

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