Televisualist: The Versatility of the Frozen North
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Televisualist: The Versatility of the Frozen North

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

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Monday

The Toronto municipal election is here at long last. You have numerous options for coverage: if you want all-night coverage, there’s OMNI (starting at 8 p.m.), CBC News Network (8 p.m.), or CP24 (all day, really). If you just want brief coverage that doesn’t interrupt your favourite shows, CBC is doing one hour (8 p.m.), as is CTV (8 p.m.); Citytv is doing a half-hour at 8:30 p.m., then following up with more coverage at 10 p.m.

2 Broke Girls returns with an episode entitled “And the Reality Problem,” which does not discuss the fact that even though these girls are supposedly broke they still have a really big apartment. Reality! (Citytv, 8 p.m.)

Back for a 10th season of comedic accidents: Canada’s Worst Driver, the reality show that somehow just keeps going. (Discovery, 10 p.m.)


Tuesday

Season 14 of Degrassi commences, which means there are teenagers watching Degrassi who are younger than Degrassi itself. (Much, 9 p.m.)

We love Eliza Coupe (Happy Endings) and we love Jay Harrington (Better Off Ted), so we are inclined to give Benched a shot, even though it’s another comedy about lawyers. (Comedy Network, 10:30 p.m.)


Wednesday

Ice Pilots NWT returns for a sixth (!) season of dangerous flying in the Frozen North. Since we already have a show about people driving in the Frozen North (Ice Road Truckers) and this show, maybe we need a show about dangerous boating in the Frozen North. Frozen Stream Paddlers: Yellowknife or something. (History, 10 p.m.)


Thursday

Two and a Half Men commences its 12th and final season, only four years after the world ended and it just kept going, a cruel illusion sustaining our belief in a livable world. Outside, the plague rats gather, attracted by the “men men men men manly men” song. Tonight, they will feast. (CTV, 9 p.m.)

The McCarthys is a sitcom about a Boston Irish family that is basically a Boston Irish family in every way possible; the twist is that the lead character/youngest son is gay. Even with that just being treated as a perfectly normal thing, remarkable only in that it allows for some lame gay jokes instead of lame straight jokes—it’s pretty hacky. It does have Laurie Metcalf, who is The Best, but, yeah. (CTV, 9:30 p.m.)

Slednecks is an MTV reality show about, essentially, partying in the Frozen North, which just goes to prove that the Frozen North is now officially a subgenre of reality show, and that if Jack London were alive today he would be a reality show producer. (MTV Canada, 10 p.m.)


Friday

M3 has picked up Jennifer Falls, the Jaime Pressly/Jessica Walter sitcom that the American network TV Land has already decided not to renew, in a demonstration of our long-standing Canadian tradition of networks doing whatever possible to fill TV hours at the absolute cheapest possible rate. Really, it’s amazing that all of these subsidiary cable networks don’t just air marathons of Automan all day long. (9 p.m.)


The Weekend

Kourtney and Khloe Take the Hamptons is the latest in the Kardashian family reality show opus. Sadly, it does not appear that in this show they will go to the Frozen North. Admit it, you would watch that show. (E!, 9 p.m. Sunday)

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