Televisualist: They Should've Called It "Paratelepathimedic"



Televisualist: They Should’ve Called It “Paratelepathimedic”

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

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“We have to award you fewer points for this magic trick because it kinda looks like you’re masturbating inside the costume.”


The Listener, the Canadian-made sci-fi/cop show about a telepathic paramedic (paratelepathimedic?) who solves crimes concludes a five-season run tonight and, while we have not always felt it was the greatest of shows (particularly during the first season, which was not very good and a major reason we were surprised when the show was renewed), it was ultimately a show that knew it was a blend of genre and procedural and did its best to reconcile the two, and mostly succeeded. (CTV, 9 p.m.)

American Ninja Warrior begins the national finals competition in Las Vegas, and we kind of love the extent to which NBC is pushing this, considering that the ultimate prize in American Ninja Warrior is to travel to Japan to compete in the original Ninja Warrior and almost certainly fail, because almost everybody fails on the original Ninja Warrior. This is would it would be like if Nietzsche had designed a competitive reality show. (9 p.m.)

Don’t Drive Here returns for a second season of (sometimes justified) finger-wagging at the “the world’s worst driving cities,” and we assume that once again Andrew Younghusband will complain repeatedly that some countries conduct driving tests in off-street driving-test complexes instead of in congested deathtrap laneways. (Discovery, 10 p.m.)


Slice debuts I Hate My Tattoo, which will surely be enlightening. After all, it is Slice. (9 p.m.)

Wizard Wars debuted on SyFy earlier this year, and it was actually pretty clever: a sort of combination of Top Chef and Iron Chef, except involving magicians—and it turns out watching magicians put together their tricks and then compete against pros is really fun. (Space, 10 p.m.)


Returning for a fourth season of why is this show even on the air: Franklin and Bash. (M3, 9 p.m.)

Epic Ink is another reality show about a tattoo parlour, and this one’s gimmick is that the tattoo parlour specializes in really fancy big tattoos. “Tattoo reality show” as a genre is something we have to admit we never anticipated, to be honest. (A&E, 10:30 p.m.)


Gypsy Sisters kicks off its second season of being a reality show about a Gypsy family with a two-hour episode! For people who like this show—and it wasn’t exactly a smash hit, but it had to compete with Walking Dead, and that’s a tall order for anybody, hence the schedule move away from Sundays—you will get even more of it! And for new viewers, you will get more of it right away! (TLC, 9 p.m.)


America’s Next Top Model commences its 21st season (sorry, “cycle,” because models are fancy and can’t have seasons like all the other TV shows), and its second to have both male and female contestants, as last season-or-cycle’s ratings were superb—thanks, one assumes, mostly to the addition of handsome male model wannabes being appreciated by the show’s target audience. (City, 9 p.m.)

The Weekend

It’s the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards, featuring performances by Nicki Minaj, Usher, Beyonce, Maroon 5, and Taylor Swift, and hosted by Lucy Hale, who is the one on Pretty Little Liars who’s kind of boring. (MTV Canada and Much, 9 p.m., Sunday)