Newsstand: October 23, 2013
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Newsstand: October 23, 2013

Fact: A random internet site said that a cup of hot water with lemon in the morning is just as effective as a cup of coffee. Hippies. In the news: some city councillors have opinions about the mayor's writing character references for criminals and alleged criminals; the TTC is getting crazy with new names for its subway lines; repairs to the Gardiner Expressway can be expected for the next bazillion years; and get your flu shot if you're between the ages of 60 and 65.

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The fact, recently revealed, that Mayor Rob Ford has written character references for at least two individuals convicted of crimes—the latest individual being his pal and alleged drug dealer Alexander Lisi, formerly convicted for threatening to kill an Etobicoke woman—has proven somewhat divisive on city council. Yes, you’re shocked, I’m sure. In short, Deputy Mayor Norm Kelly is into it, ’cause friends write friends reference letters on their mayoral letterhead, and Councillor Michelle Berardinetti (Ward 35, Scarborough Southwest) a former member of Ford’s executive committee, thinks it’s bad news. You would, Michelle Berardinetti. Always killing everyone’s buzz.

The TTC is revamping the names of its subway lines. Stumble over the cumbersome moniker “Yonge-University-Spadina line” no longer, as that line will henceforth be referred to, on signs and maps at least, as—wait for it—“line number 1.” Don’t get me started on the Bloor-Danforth line’s new designation, as that shit will blow your mind.

If traffic is your bag, you’re in luck. There are currently eight repair projects underway along the decrepit Gardiner Expressway—more than $100-million worth—and increased congestion and lane closures along the city’s main commuter artery are pretty much guaranteed for the next 100 years, like, at least. Okay, fine, probably a bit less than that.

And lastly, get your flu shot. A new Toronto study says the shot can significantly cut the risk of heart attack for people in their mid-sixties. That’s so specific. You guys are what, like, 62?

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