Televisualist: Yes, We Said "Death Leprechauns"
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Televisualist: Yes, We Said “Death Leprechauns”

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

Brett did not supply names for these two new characters, so we have arbitrarily decided to call them Stevie and Duckhead. Their continuing adventures will shock and delight you.

Monday

The CBC has brought back InSecurity for a second season, and we quite enjoyed the first season in a low-key, Canadian sort of way. It’s not the most brilliant comedy the Ceeb has ever aired, of course—after all, the trailers for season two prominently feature a fart joke—but it’s got its own sort of dorky charm that wears well. (8:30 p.m.)

House returns for its eighth season and its first sans Lisa Edelstein’s Cuddy. To make up for it, the show adds yet another winsome twentysomething doctor, this one played by Odette Annable, who finds House fascinating. Also showing up as a new doctor in season eight: Charlyne Yi, who we are informed is not found to be completely insufferable by some people. We do not know who these people are. Presumably they are people who did not grit their teeth through Paper Heart, but then again a whole lot of people didn’t go see that movie, which is good, except for people not knowing how irritating Charlyne Yi is, and that’s bad. (Global, 9 p.m.)

Space has picked up Paranormal Witness, which is basically America’s Most Wanted except with ghosts instead of criminals. Dear Space: you don’t have to pick up everything SyFy airs in the U.S. You really, really don’t. (10 p.m.)

Tuesday

Hey, City Slickers! We’re actually really curious to see if this movie has aged well; we remember it being really funny and charming, back when Billy Crystal was still a star (remember how long ago that was? He hasn’t shown up in a live-action movie in nearly a decade), back when Jack Palance and Bruno Kirby were still with us, back before we even thought that there might be a sequel that would suck the soul from your very body. So we said “what the hell” and went out and rented the DVD (yes, you can still do that) and… it’s still good! So watch it. (CHCH, 8 p.m.)

Wednesday

The Simpsons rerun of the week: “Simpsons Bible Stories,” the vignette episode where the cast re-enacts the stories of Adam and Eve, Moses, and King David. “Forty years? But after that, it’s clear sailing for the Jews, right?” (Comedy Network, 8 p.m.)

Hot In Cleveland returns, and…well, it’s not a bad show. It goes “big” more than some (including Televisualist) might like; this is not a subtle show, and all members of the talented cast are capable of far more than the belly-laugh lines they’re given. But, on the other hand, most of the lines are actually reasonably funny, and they can deliver the shit out of them. So on balance, it’s fun. We just grade it on a curve for wasted talent. (CTV, 9:30 p.m.)

Tonight’s episode of The Ultimate Fighter is called “Death Leprechauns,” and we have no idea what is going to happen on it, but… come on, you have to admit that’s a great title right there. (Spike, 10 p.m.)

Thursday

It’s the Ontario provincial election! Has Tim Hudak convinced enough people he is not in fact a soulless Tory? Has Andrea Horwath dropped Jack Layton’s name enough times to win more seats? Has Dalton McGuinty managed to convince the electorate that, yes, he is still the least worst choice even after nearly a decade of all of us kind of disliking him? The answers will all come, for better or worse, tonight! (TVO and CP24 from 8 p.m.; Global, CHCH, and Newsworld from 9 p.m.; CTV for one hour, 9-10 p.m.)

Friday

The CBC is airing a special edition of Hockey Night In Canada celebrating the return of the Winnipeg Jets. Assuming you care about the return of the Winnipeg Jets. Since Televisualist is not running for office, we feel safe in saying we don’t care much at all. We bet Tim Hudak can’t stop talking about how great it is that the Jets are back, though. (8 p.m.)

Man vs. Wild returns, featuring Jake Gyllenhaal as he and Bear Grylls go to Iceland and do survivoring sorts of things. We’re not sure why Jake Gyllenhaal is going to Iceland, to be honest, but Source Code was really very good so we’ll not quibble about it. (Discovery, 9 p.m.)

The Weekend

Turner Classic airs a mini-marathon of Buster Keaton classic comedies: Sherlock Jr., Steamboat Bill Jr., and The Cameraman. Sadly, no The General (probably the greatest of Keaton’s silent works) but they did manage to stuff a very early short with Keaton starring alongside Fatty Arbuckle in the middle there, so on the whole this is an excellent way to stay up late Sunday night. (beginning at 8 p.m. Sunday)

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