Declassified: Abusive Gay Budgies
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Declassified: Abusive Gay Budgies

In today's Declassified: self-conscious public-reading choices, misguided girlfriend-seekers, and a pair of bitchy birds.

In Soviet Russia, Diva Bird Own You

Mariah? If the budgies were into Beyonce, it’d be a much faster sell.

Hot For…Dental Hygienist?

Wouldn’t it be awkward to make out with someone knowing they’ve scraped your mouth gunk?

The Girlfriend Experience

If it didn’t work as a movie, it won’t work as an approach to life either. Confucius said that.

Roommate with Benefits?!

Honey, you are NOT all that and a bag of Lays. For the love of your own face-saving, at least offer to pay her entire rent.

Seen Reading

Five dollars says, at some point in their brief exchange, there was discussion of Kerouac. Torontoist can smell your kind!

A lot of people do a lot of weird stuff on the internet, and ground zero for commercial e-weirdness is Craigslist. In Declassified Torontoist combs over our city’s listings to find the best (and worst) of the bunch.

Find listings we should include in our next edition? Email them to [email protected].