Well, we hope you guys love shitty movies. Because if you do, you’re in luck! This week sees patronizing racial drama, flat action-comedy, and ham-fisted investigation work hit theatre screens like a ton of bricks. Maybe Fi5al De5tination 5 is good. But neither Kiva Reardon nor John Semley saw it, because they were too busy watching crap, so they don’t know. If you want to know, you’ll have to read about it somewhere else. Oh, hang on. This just in: Our editor is saying to not read about it somewhere else.