Declassified: Billions of Dollars' Worth of Marijuana
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Declassified: Billions of Dollars’ Worth of Marijuana

A lot of people do a lot of weird stuff on the Internet. And ground zero for commercial e-weirdness is Craigslist, the online flea market where you can find everything from a used sofa to tickets to a Jays game to a suitable one-night stand. In this new column, Torontoist combs over our city’s listings to find the best (and worst) of the bunch.

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Illustration by Roxanne Ignatius/Torontoist.


In this edition of Declassified: billion-dollar job offers, long-lost daughters, and a deal on dairy that’s too good to be true.

A Multy Billion Dollar Offer

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Guys, let’s all quit our jobs and sell weed full-time. Billions of dollars’ worth of weed. What, the cops? OH YEAH, the cops. Does anyone have a decent Rolodex? Because we’re gonna need a really good lawyer! Ah, screw it. Let’s find one the same way we found someone to buy the couch.

Not the Ideal Venue

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Sometimes Missed Connections is like a keyhole view into a vast, icy cavern of human regret.

The Five or Six of Us Were Meant To Be Together

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Nice try.

Stains Included

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Finally, something to pile our antique unwashed laundry on, while we contemplate scraping the vintage fried egg residue off the artisanally crafted pile of dishes in the sink.

Shady Dairy Deal of a Lifetime

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Counterfeiting dairy is a serious crime, with real victims. You think you’re about to gulp down some nice Sealtest 2%, but then NO. Cornstarch and rainwater.

Maybe This Was In the Closet For a Reason

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Yes, the second “p” seems redundant, but it’s very important. (Discovered by Paul Terefenko.)
Find listings we should include in our next edition? Email them to [email protected].

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