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Newsstand: November 19, 2009
You’d probably think you were on the wrong site if you pulled up today’s Newsstand and didn’t see anything about yesterday’s TTC…um…what rhymes with “blusterduck”? Perhaps the Toronto Star delivered the most effective hat trick of coverage of yesterday’s debacle: After Tuesday’s Trudeau Poll results named transportation Toronto’s biggest source of emo woe, the Star then regaled the reader with tales of how super pissed people are about the fare hike, culminating in last night’s complete shutdown of subway service between Bloor and Eglinton. Despite all that has happened, is it terrible to be concerned about what all this worry is doing to poor Adam’s pretty face? Then again, grey hair is rather sexy…
It seems strange to think that this is good news, but the provincial government wants to poke everyone with sharp objects today. Health Minister Deb Matthews says that the decision to offer the H1N1 vaccine to all Ontarians (including Peel region, a fact with which we teased you yesterday) “will apply to all health units across Ontario, even though a number of health units began to immunize members of the general population earlier because they had the capacity and vaccine supply to do it.” But are we just too desensitized to care anymore? “We have just seen a decreased appetite for vaccination,” said Dr. Robin Williams (we kid you not). “We’re no longer on the front of the news. I think people are losing their energy and interest in it.” Losing interest in getting stabbed with needles? Has the world gone insane?
In the “news that isn’t really news” category, tongues are wagging as to whether or not the G20 will come to Toronto. Did anyone say it actually was? (Hint: Not really…but everyone seems to postulate otherwise.) Of course, it might just be a slow news week—the Post also covered a free burrito giveaway at the First Canadian Place food court yesterday morning, the highlight being that a “woman in a brown coat angrily storms off when she’s told that if she’s looking at the back of the security guard’s head, she’s not getting a free burrito.” Then again (place obligatory reader discretion advisory here), if you’re looking at the back of someone’s head (especially a man in uniform), Mexican food should be the last thing on your mind…at least until afterwards. Amirite, kids? Awww, yeah.
And, finally, in celebrity news, charges against the manager for the Black Eyed Peas have been dropped, stemming from a post-MMVA assault on infamous blogger Perez Hilton outside a Toronto nightclub. Now, our editors have given carte blanche on any snarky quips that may result from this juicy tidbit of news (you may remember our in-depth coverage of the incident in June), but this Newsstand author would rather hear what you have to say. To make things interesting, please craft your catty comments in the form of a haiku.