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Newsstand: October 19, 2009
Ever since a conference of “gay delegates” picked Toronto to host the World Pride 2014 festivities yesterday, one thing has been clear: the bar is now high. If Toronto is going to step up as the proudest city in the world and finally show those punks in Stockholm, we need to start gathering an unprecedented amount of self-esteem right now. And what better way is there to build ourselves up than to go over what else we’ve accomplished lately, and how it makes us, as a city, look good. Think of the following as talking points to bring out when interviewing for the job of being awesome.
Take how we always find a way to focus on the positive. Recently, it may surprise you to learn, there’s been some tension between cyclists and drivers in Toronto. Tempers have run short, and it’s clear that something needs to be done if cooler heads are to prevail. To that end, the Toronto Cyclists Union has printed out stacks and stacks of “Thank You” cards for motorists who do their part to share the road with bikes. The idea is that first a driver avoids endangering a cyclist, and this brightens that cyclist’s day. Then, the cyclist, at the first convenient moment, gives said driver a heartfelt message of thanks, and this brightens their day. Pretty soon all of us, motorists and pedallers alike, will be shaking our heads over how much we all used to fight. The union just kicked off the project, but we’re already projecting a sharp decline in the number of injuries to cyclists—and feelings.
Not only are we peacemakers, we’re also always ready to see the best in people. That warm, sunny disposition was on full display at the Toronto Reference Library for the three-million-dollar federal funding announcement delivered yesterday by an endearingly uptight guy named Steve, who was visiting from Ottawa. Although a reporter rudely asked for comment on criticisms that the bulk of stimulus funds is being delivered to Conservative ridings, Harper didn’t go all sweatypalms on us. Even though he, Canada’s only prime minister to also be a pretend former Beatle, was probably tuckered out after trooping all the way down to Yonge and Bloor with his giant novelty cheque, he was still a crowd-pleaser, raising his eyebrows and answering the question with an expansive “Well, here I am,” to the delight of all. There he sure was! Besides, looking up the actual spending numbers is too hard, anyway!
Another good thing about Toronto is that we know when a situation has become so dire that we have to send in top talent to fix it. And maybe, just maybe, that’s why CityTV, one of Toronto’s most dynamic media outlets, has set up shop in the badly uncared-about Yonge-Dundas Square. No doubt the public space, currently known for tent-sales, sporadic concerts, and an unparallelled collection of billboards, will get an invigorating jolt from CityTV and its sibling station, Omni. Sounds great! Can we rename the place, too? What do you think of calling it the City Block? Okay, the Znaimer Quadrangle? OMNIPLAZA might also be a good fit, don’t you think?
Ever the self-improvement champ, Toronto is always looking for constructive criticism, which is why city officials are being told they need to get better at answering their phones. Oh, and Rogers gave us Indian TV channels and free long-distance calls on Diwali! And it seems we Torontonians have bought a whole lot of hot tubs lately, so that’s nice! To top it all off, the Leafs have…well, everyone’s talking about them, right?