Snappy Answers: T-Shirts and Sunglasses? Cruel Jokes, Not Appreciated.
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Snappy Answers: T-Shirts and Sunglasses? Cruel Jokes, Not Appreciated.

Snappy Answers runs every Saturday afternoon. Send your questions, be they tough or trivial, to [email protected].
I need to quickly expand my awesome-t-shirt collection, but I work for about minimum wage. Where can I find delicious, locally designed and made tees (preferably eco-friendly) without spending my entire paycheque?

Dear Senning,
We almost called you Sunning, then realized that was merely wishful thinking on yet another dark and stormy day in the middle of freaking June.
So, you want t-shirts, presumably not from cheap chain stores or fancy-schmantz boutiques. Good thinking: we hear t-shirts are going to be huge this season. That is, if it ever gets seasonable.
Okay, okay, we’re moving on. For sustainable style, visit the adorably-named Heart on Your Sleeve, 61A Bellevue Street at Nassau Street. The ethical fashion shop carries a selective range of Canadian wears, including handmade and screenprinted organic cotton tees. And while you’re in Kensington Market, keep in mind that it doesn’t get any eco-friendlier than recycling. Browse through the racks of vintage that line Kensington and Augusta avenues for old band shirts and camp tees on the cheap.
For local, original graphic art at fifty bucks a pop, check out t-shirt designer Scott Waring’s cool, brit-poppy Gems & Junk line, available exclusively at Ukula (492 College Street).
As for delicious, we’re not quite sure what you mean, but we hear adding two spoonfuls of Nutella to a load of tees adds a rather nice aftertaste.

When I’m hungover as hell, I hide behind huge sunglasses, whether or not it’s actually sunny. Is this normal? Or okay? Or is it totally rude to order coffee with Ray-Bans on?

Um, yeah it’s rude. It’s rude and it’s obnoxious and it’s standoffish and it also screams for all kinds of attention and it will make some kinds of people instantly dislike you.
So? Do you really need those people to like you? If you’re going to have a heart-to-heart with the baristo while he makes you a double iced caramel soy what-have-you, then you probably want to at least lower your shades for a little eye contact and consideration. But if honestly, all you want is that espresso, he’s probably just as happy not to look into your bloodshot-to-hell gaze while ringing it up for you.
We say, as long as you don’t wear your sunglasses at night, go ahead and hide in them all morning after. We can sympathize. In fact, we’re typing this from behind a massive pair of vintage stunners, despite being in a basement with no lights on, and we don’t even care what the cat thinks.