Televisualist: Nanni, Myths, and Debate Tiffs
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Televisualist: Nanni, Myths, and Debate Tiffs

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.
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Monday

Tonight’s Mythbusters is a personal favorite—it’s the one where Adam and Jamie try to invent a “human slingshot” to test the myth that Mexicans are literally flinging themselves into the United States. Wheeeee! (Discovery Channel, 8 p.m.)
TVO is re-airing In Search of Shakespeare, which aired on PBS a couple months ago. Televisualist missed it then, so we watched an episode last week and—well, it’s interesting, if classical English literature is your bag. The narration might be a bit off at times, but it’s a good documentary special. (10 p.m.)

Tuesday

Sheer goddamned manliness, so manly it makes a cowboy shed a single tear in awe. James Coburn winning a gunfight with a knife. Yul Brynner’s death stare. Steve McQueen getting all the good jokes. Charles Bronson, for crissake—Charles Bronson! The Magnificent Seven. Oh yes. (AMC, 8 p.m.)
Two weeks in a row I’m recommending a classic Star Trek: The Next Generation episode, but come on! It’s “Relics!” The one with Scotty in it! How can you not want to see that one again? (Space, 9 p.m.)

Wednesday

If you aren’t tired of it yet, there’s yet another Democratic presidential candidates’ debate, moderated by likely worthless television “journalists” trying to play their never-ending game of gotcha with Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Of course, there is the distinct possibility that a great performance by Obama could make Hillary’s likely victory in Pennsylvania either too weak or nonexistent and essentially give him the nomination. It could happen! Shut up! (ABC, 8 p.m.)
The Simpsons rerun of the week: “The Boy Who Knew Too Much,” where Bart sees Mayor Quimby’s asshole son assault a defenseless waiter. Or not. “It’s pronounced chow-dah! CHOW-DAH!” (CFMT, 10 p.m.)

Thursday

So the tribes have merged on Survivor: Micronesia, Fans Versus Favorites (eesh, what a title), and if you haven’t been following, the skinny is thus: most of the really appealing returning players have either been voted off or eliminated due to injury, leaving producer-favourites James and Ozzy as the only really fan-favourite players left. Ozzy has the hidden immunity idol and everybody knows it. In a shocking twist, the “fans” turned out to be the usual gang of struggling wannabe actors from California plus three older people from the Midwest who actually watch the show. And Jeff Probst is still a douche. (Global, 8 p.m.)
Major League. This is one of my “if it’s on I’ll inevitably sit down and watch the whole damn thing” movies, even though it’s airing on Peachtree TV and therefore all the bad swears will be “modified” to protect the poor, innocent children who might not have figured out that baseball players swear a lot and scratch themselves. (9 p.m.)

Friday

Caro Diario (“Dear Diary”) is one of my favorite foreign flicks: starring the Italian comedian Nanni Moretti as himself, it’s essentially a set of three short movies, the first being about driving around on his motor scooter (and his obsession with Jennifer Beals), the second being about looking for the proper remote island to finish his film alongside a friend who strenuously hates television, and the third being about his real-life experiences with a zillion doctors who all thought he had cancer. It’s an oddball little movie. Check it out. (TLN, 8 p.m.)
A new episode of Man Made Marvels tonight, focusing on the Taiwanese skyscraper “Taipei 101,” which has apparently affected the geological makeup of Taiwan itself simply by being so big. But the CN Tower is still taller! And just you wait until a meteor hits that building in Dubai! And the other one in Chicago! And… (Discovery Channel, 8 p.m.)

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