TV Party: Harper Defeats War In Afghanistan
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TV Party: Harper Defeats War In Afghanistan

2006_12_20harper.jpgIf you’re one of those people who doesn’t hit the snooze button until five minutes before you actually have to leave for work, you might have caught an interesting announcement this morning on that venerable Canadian news/pap institution known as Canada AM: CTV News has chosen its top ten news stories of 2006. Yes, an “esteemed panel of Canadian journalists,” which apparently is CTV’s euphemism for their own senior staff, chose ten stories from throughout the past year and ranked them in order of importance. Since it’s a scientific fact that every person in the world LOVES year end lists, here’s what Uncle Lloyd and company came up with:

1. Stephen Harper Elected Prime Minister
2. War in Afghanistan
3. Lebanese-Canadians Evacuated From Middle East War Zone
4. British Columbia Ferry Disaster
5. Dawson College Shooting
6. Alleged Toronto Terror Suspect Arrests
7. Laval, Quebec Overpass Collapse
8. Canada’s Winter Olympic Medal Count
9. West Coast Storms
10. Stephane Dion Elected Liberal Leader

CTV will be airing an in-depth report on each story on their 11 PM national news, starting December 23. There’s bound to be some debate among people who care about this sort of thing as to the order of the stories, as well as about some glaring omissions. But should Stephen Harper lose a federal election in 2007, he can take solace in the fact that in at least one poll, he totally kicked Stephane Dion’s ass!

A few things to watch this week:

Tonight: The Colbert Report – Faux’Reilly Stephen Colbert takes on Chris Funk of The Decemberists in a guitar duel. Seriously. After claiming they ripped off his green screen challenge (where Colbert fangeeks used footage of their hero dancing around with a light-sabre in front of a green screen to create online movies), Colbert accepted the band’s guitar solo challenge. Can he play guitar as well as he can play a conservative nutjob? You’ll want to find out. Comedy Network, 11:30 PM
Thursday: Rocky IV – With all the confusion in the world today, with all the wars against indefinable enemies, with all the abstract concepts (war on terrorism, war on extremism, etc.), and with all the hoopla surrounding the new Rocky Balboa, let this underrated classic take you back to a simpler time, when the cut-and-dried battle against Cold War-era Soviet communism could be won by one man, in the ring. Plus, it has the all-time greatest training montage in movie history! Moviepix, 9 PM
Monday (Christmas Day): Log – The Christmas Special – For years those of us without a fireplace have been able to simulate the feeling of a Norman Rockwell Christmas by turning on our televisions Christmas morning and watching a video-taped Yule log burn for four hours to the tune of Jingle Bells. Cheesy TV at its finest! CityTV, 6 AM