Protecting Creba Witnesses, Suing Elephants and Internet Virgin a Hoax?
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Protecting Creba Witnesses, Suing Elephants and Internet Virgin a Hoax?

2006_5_17creba.jpgThe police admit that they’ve been protecting witnesses and sources to the Jane Creba shooting. They’ve put up a $50,000 reward and got 20 investigators working on it. Here’s hoping they close the case soon.
Natalie Novak, the Ryerson student allegedly murdered by her estranged boyfriend apparently had a rocky past with her ex-beau. He was even convicted of assaulting her and barred from seeing her.
Finally a baby and mom narrowly missed getting shot in their own home near Jane and the 401.
A lawyer for the province, defending the pit bull ban, called the animals the “automatic weapons of the dog world” and cited attacks as a reason to continue the ban.
2006_5_17dumbo.jpgA zoo owner is in court today because he used two of his elephants during a fundraiser. A lawyer called the elephants the “tactical nuclear weapon of the animal world” and cited their large droppings and possible unruly behaviour in defence of their large-eared young as reasons why the zoo owner should be fined.
New provincial hygiene rules might threaten farmers markets around Toronto. Health Minister George Smitherman assures us that market organizers and vendors will be consulted over the summer before legislation hits the floor of the legislature.
Hey you can be creative with the TTC and this time they won’t even threaten to sue you. The Commission is looking for new names for their subway cars.
A woman gives birth outside a North York supermarket. Baby and mom are fine.
Finally, Geoff the “internet virgin” we reported on yesterday is apparently a big fat liar. That’s according to his girlfriend who also said they were never engaged and have actually done it. While there’s a chance she might be lying to squelch any chances of Geoff’s future happiness. We’re inclined to think that Geoff is just really bored and wanted some attention. Nonetheless if he is lying we hope his next sexual experience is an unpleasant one.

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