Behind Idol Mania

By Joshua Errett

Fact:
New reports of Idol-judge incest have linked judge Paula A. with various American Idol contestants, including that Justin guy.
Fact:
Lengthy line-ups to get into Canadian Idol auditions and unruly media coverage are handcuffing the city.
Fact:
The lustful judges Farley Flex and Sass Jordan (pictured) are objects of desire for many young Canadians.
Fact:
Idol had to extend auditions in Toronto.
Are we the only ones who see what’s going on here?? Open your eyes, people. It should be obvious. Canadian Idol may be running some sort of prostitution ring/matchmaking service for its judges and possibly even Ben Mulroney. More on this to follow.