Overheard outside the ROM during last night's bomb scare. A small group of friends is standing on the corner of Bloor and University, facing the museum. Guy: You know, if they could figure out a way to destroy just the crystal and leave the rest of the museum intact, I think I'd be okay with this.........

Overheard by tyrannosaurus_rek in the ticketholders line for the opening night of the Toronto After Dark Film Festival. A young man and woman are discussing what they'll do after the screening of Mulberry Street. Her: We're not After Party people, so stop pretending we are.......

You know all those flashy LED lights on the CN Tower? Apparently they're going to get flashier by this Thursday. U of T is set to approve the plan to build a $53 million Centre for High Performance Sport just west of Varsity Stadium on Bloor Street. Maybe their football team could start training to win a game. A 13-year-old has become a quadriplegic after a gang-related stabbing outside of Christie Station on Friday......

Overheard this afternoon on the bus. The TTC driver, while in traffic, is in conversation with a fellow driver. An accident has occurred outside of Downsview station. Driver: Did you see that? The car was almost ripped in half! He must have had a heart attack… Fellow Driver: Maybe he was on his cell phone. Driver: By the way, can you hear my latest entertainment device? They’re getting really strict about this stuff. It’s top......

Overheard in the Parkdale LCBO on Brock Street. A young man is talking to an employee. Young man, sheepishly: "Excuse me, sir, but I can't seem to locate the malt liquor..." Employee: "Aw, da 40's? We ain't got none."......

Overheard on the subway between Chester and Pape. A homeless man is asking people for money and a mother and her teenage son are conversing. Man: "Spare change for a homeless man, would you help a homeless man? The hostels are closed and I haven't eaten in three days. Would you help a homeless man, ma'am?" Mother: "Sorry." Man leaves. Son: "Mom, that guy lives in our building!"......

Overheard on the eastbound Queen streetcar at Shaw St. A young couple is talking loudly about how worldly they are when the car stops in front of the Museum of Contemporary Canadian Art. Him: (Pointing at the big blue sculpture outside) What's that? Her: That's an "art." One stop later. Driver: (to another passenger) Excuse me, can I see your pass? Him: Her past? Why would you need to show your past to get on......

Overheard by reader Adam in a store at Bathurst and St. Clair. A kid has apparently just soiled his trousers. He has relied on empirical evidence for his mother to figure this out. Mom: Have you...Awww...Why didn’t you tell me? Kid: (Shrugs shoulders) It was too late. Mom: (Looks wistfully into the street): It’s never too late.......

We here in the Ist-A-Verse know that we're sensational, but it's very rare that we get a chance to be sensationalistic. This week, we've decided to have ourselves a little fun and try our hand at tacky tabloid headlines, using nothing more than our favorite posts from this week. Torontoist Special Report: Rosie to Trump: "Fire 300 Bicyclists for Fraud!" On DCist: Students Go Wild for Slogans, Secrets and Sexual Harassment The action was thick......

Overheard by reader Elena H. on the westbound Queen streetcar just before River St., at around 6pm, on January 22nd. Having told his mother that her bangs were too poofy and tried to fix them, a little boy, around six or seven, changes the topic… Little boy: The TTC is faster than a race car, right? Mother: No Little boy: Yes, the TTC is faster than a race car. Mother: No, it’s not. Little boy:......

Overheard at the intersection of Bloor and Spadina last night where two women were talking, walking east. Woman A: So I said, "that's not an ass, it's an elbow!" Woman B: Tee Hee! May we all have the strength to know one from the other.......

Overheard in the lobby halfway through the second act of Wicked, the "spellbinding musical" at the Canon Theatre. An usher approaches a couple exiting with their coats. Usher: Is everything alright? Man: Yes. We just couldn't be in there anymore. Usher: Was there a problem? Woman: There's just too much singing.......

Overheard in a midtown tea shop where two women are sitting with with their respective children, a boy and a girl. Both of the kids are about four years old. The little boy is talking excitedly to his mother about Santa Claus. Adorable Little Girl (removing lollipop from mouth, and a propos of nothing in particular): Fire will kill you! Pause in little boy/mother discussion. ALG (louder, with enthusiasm): If you go in fire, you’ll......

Overheard by everyone anywhere near the obviously crazy woman standing next to transfer machine at Wellesley station on a rainy afternoon. Crazy: (screaming to no one in particular) If you don't like me, then you can marry Dan Aykroyd! Yes we can, lady. Yes we can. Overhear something that you've got to share? Send it to streeter@torontoist.com.......

Overheard at 2 AM along Queen West last week by a reader who wishes to remain anonymous. MuchMusic VJs Sarah Taylor and Devon Soltendieck are walking together, and appear to be quite happy. The VJs smile at two pretty teenaged girls as they pass by. Girl #1 (in a congratulatory tone): Bang up job on the channel, boys! Devon (immediately turning around and yelling): Boys?! Boys?! This is a beautiful woman that you're talking to......

Overheard at a stoplight while leaving Queen's Park at 12:30 PM today. Guy: So, are you voting today? Girl: Well, I don't really know anything about the people running. So...no. Guy: Oh... Girl: Yeah, but, I mean, I support the whole idea. Guy: What, "democracy"? If you hear something that you want to share, send it to streeter@torontoist.com with the details (who/what/when/where), and we might feature it on the site. Happy listening!......

Overheard at a King Street eatery, 10:00 PM Tuesday. Patron*: Excuse me, waitress? Can I please be moved to a different table? I think the two men at the table next to mine are gay." Waitress: "And you don't want to catch it, right?" Patron: "Well, I'm not worried about that. I'm just concerned about...you know...hearing private conversations." Didn't anyone tell him this was Canada? We let gay people get married here. *On a side-note,......

Bookninja pointed us to Julie Wilson's Seen Reading blog. Wilson works in the publishing industry here in Toronto but on her blog she becomes a literary spy of sorts. She makes a note of what people are reading in public, guesses where you are in the book and concocts a blog post that riffs on that. We think it's a little like Overheard or Streeter, but for the literary crowd. We like it.......

Overheard by Sarah H. on Queen West around Dovercourt. Guy 1: I saw the weirdest thing the other day. A guy smoking and shaving fish. Guy 2: Shaving fish? Guy 1: Shaving fish. Guy 2: With a knife? Guy 1: With a knife. Guy 2: Like, taking the scales off? Guy 1: Yeah. And he was smoking a cigarette while he was doing it. If you hear something that you want to share, send it......

Overheard on the 211 bus, Montreal, highway 20, direction Ouest. Sandy-haired teen: At the last Just For Laughs, this comic told this joke. He said:      "I travel in America and people ask me, 'what's the story with Toronto and Montreal?' So I tell them, it's like you have two brothers. One is an accountant. The other is a womanizing alcoholic."      And before he gets to the end of the sentence, the crowd starts cheering,......

"Overheard" on the Toronto Livejournal community: ME (On Bicycle): What kind of bike is that? COP (On horseback, in the bike lane): WHAT? ME: What kind of bike is that? COP: It's a horse. ME: Great! Get the @#$% out of the bike lane then. We have to admire this guy's moxie and want to point you to Matt Blackett's passionate rant about mounted cops from the Spacing Wire.......

Overheard at one of the many Fringe lineups. Guy to Girl: It's not that I have no dignity. It's just that my dignity is cheaply bought.......

Upset little old lady to her friend: I just HATE that all my pantsuits have tapered legs! I hate this modern world. Overheard by Ann on the Street(car).......

Overheard in the ladies washroom at the IFOA last night: "Yeah, you know that guy I'm with is my boyfriend, but my parents don't know that we're together. I can't tell my family because he's so much older than me."......

Just to mix it up a bit, we're taking a momentary departure from the usual spoken-word Streeter to bring you a particularly amusing written edition. Think you can handle the wild ride? Scrawled on the bottom of TOist's lovely coworker's Second Cup coffee cup: Decaf. Americano. Hottie. Overheard something wacky? Let us know.......

TOist tipster Rishi sends us this streeter: - Overheard a great piece of conversation today in the elevator at work - A middle-aged woman said after noticing her co-worker's tattoos: My twenty year-old came home with the letters S-A-U-G-A tattooed down his forearm. I asked him if that was a gang, but he said it stood for the last five letters of Mississauga. He's probably going to regret that one day." Perhaps.......

Apropos of the greatness that was Slate's piece on Overheard in NY, TOist will say we like the motto of the website discussed at length in said article: "Anytime you overhear people, if you only hear a second of what they say, it's always completely stupid." Consider that, and weigh heavily upon the blustery bluff that flew out the open windows of the Future Cafe as we walked home around midnight. Guy sitting at one......

If they weren't construction workers, they could be cast as construction workers in the upcoming Torontoist biopic (simply entitled "Torontoist"). Overheard on St Clair West, around the breakfast hour, here's what the two men said: Construction Worker A: What're ya getting for breakfast? Construction Worker B: I don't know. Something cheap. Like for a couple dollars...ya know? Construction Worker A: Bro, that's why there should be a Buckfast around here. Construction Worker B: Huh? Construction......