David Miller and David Cronenberg will be present today for the opening of Filmport, the new high-end film production facility that's ready to go just as Toronto's film industry collapses under the weight of a high-value loonie. On the bright side, if nobody wants to use Filmport, it can hold millions and millions of sport coats. Sunrise Propane finally broke its silence by asking people not to rush to judgment over the North York......

Gas prices in Toronto are at $1.09 or more a litre today, reflecting all-time record oil prices of over US$108 per barrel. For all our driving readers, it might cheer you up to consider that it's still cheaper to fill up your car with gas than say, orange juice or Diet Pepsi. By the way, if you do decide to go with orange juice, remember that the pulp-free kind is less likely to gum up......

Federal finance minister Jim Flaherty emphasized that today's budget will be "frugal" in anticipation of an economic slowdown in the coming year. To demonstrate the concept in symbolic terms, Flaherty had an old pair of shoes resoled instead of buying the pair of new shoes traditionally associated with budgets. Flaherty also announced that he's saving money on undergarments by going "commando," although to be fair that gesture is more about sexiness than symbolism. A......

Two men who went on a Hollywood-worthy crime spree Saturday night and Sunday morning are being sought in a carjacking, shooting, three robberies, and a high-speed police chase. Descriptions of the suspects have now been released—if this is you, please turn yourself in. What do you give the province that has everything? That's what Alberta politicians will be asking themselves, with a provincial election expected to be called there this week. Likely winners are......

Unionized Toronto Star employees met at a downtown hotel yesterday and voted 96% in favour of a strike, or as the Star itself might say, "Star Employees Vote To Strike At Hotel." In another sign of potential economic trouble on the horizon, the benchmark TSX stock index dropped 623 points in two days. While most issues declined, analysts declared themselves bullish on several sectors, including rural real estate, bottled water, and firearms. The San......

Sections of downtown core shut down for fear of falling debris. David Miller responds by initiating the "Less Wind Now" campaign, encouraging Ottawa to build "a giant wall" around Toronto to serve as a windbreak. Forty year mortages have arrived. Suggested advertising slogan: "Now you can be in your seventies and still not have paid down your house! Federal poll shows Tories back on top by seven points. Apparently, the secret for the Tories'......

Gas prices are up three cents a litre as the price of oil crossed the psychological threshold of US$100 a barrel for the first time ever. Upon hearing the news, Stephen Harper flew to the Alberta oil sands and gave a stirring speech about how victory would soon be his, whereupon he was roundly cheered by all the hosts of Mordor. A low-level mobster claims that in 1974 he was tasked with assassinating Pierre......