SPORTS: It’s clobbering time! Toronto’s favourite women on wheels are inviting you to a weekend of roller derby mayhem in the form of the 3rd Annual Quad City Chaos tournament. This two-day event features a variety of teams competing it out round-robin style. The event will be taking place at the new venue in Downsview [...]

PETS: Cats. What are they good for, anyway? If you’re rooting for the other team, check out the The Purina National Dog Show—which will feature relay racing, a grooming competition, and doggies, doggies, everywhere. Mississauga’s International Centre (6900 Airport Road), Friday to Sunday, 10 a.m., $10 adults, $6 children. ART: You don’t have to take [...]

“This is a professional theatre company, but it’s not like a Mirvish show. We’re gonna show you our tits!” So began the second installment of Les Coquettes burlesque troupe’s Speakeasy dinner theatre series on Monday night, housed in the exposed-brick fortress of Little Italy’s Revival bar. It seemed appropriate that the event be held there, [...]

Cabaret Enchanté The Revival (783 College Street) October 30, 7 p.m. and 9 p.m. Tickets from $15 (standing room only) to $30 (VIP banquette and cabaret seats) Talk about your happy endings. If there’s one medium that can remake a fairy tale without it feeling tired or clichéd, it’s burlesque. And what better group to [...]

SEX: Now that we have your attention, let us tell you about The Everything To Do With Sex Show, featuring such activities as “Got Ass Best Booty Contest,” “The Bad Boy of Hypnosis,” “Bottoms Up, Impact Play,” “I’m A Little Tied Up,” “Hedonistic Lifestyle,” and many more, this show promises to oil those rusty “kinks” [...]

Babes in Space the Sequel: The Wrath of Thong The Revival (783 College St.) August 28 and September 1 There are a few things you might learn at the Revival’s Star Wars vs. Star Trek burlesque show, Babes in Space the Sequel: The Wrath of Thong, that you didn’t even know you wanted to know: [...]

We feel kind of lazy, racking up back-to-back listings of the Revue’s Spielberg Summer programme in two consecutive weeks. But you know what? It’s summer. And like it or lump it, nothing says summer like Spielberg. And even though there’s plenty of indie and art-house stuff going on this week, it’s a fact that the bulk of indie and arthouse films do not have early CGI dinosaurs. Most important, though, if you were born anywhere between, like, 1984 and 1987, there’s a good chance Jurassic Park is the pinnacle of your summer movie nostalgia.

The question comes to me sometimes. Maybe I’m attaching carpet tape to someone else's nipples, or telling a too-enthusiastic audience member who’s jumped onstage to keep his underwear on, or saying “spin to the left, then drop your pants” to one of the boys who wants some help with his routine. How did this happen? Specifically, how did I wind up co-founding Canada’s premiere all-male burlesque troupe?

In today’s Urban Planner: eat some more Italian food with the excuse that it’s Italy’s 150th birthday; check out some dramatic shots of Toronto burlesque performers; appreciate your urban forest; and see an artist’s interpretation of online dating profile pics.

This week sees a lot of second-run rehash (The Social Network, Due Date, Never Let Me Go) as all the old 2010 reels makes their final rounds. As ever, there are some standout screenings this week, though. Like a great anthology film, some second-run Coens, and more trashy goodness from local B-moviemeister Chris Alexander.

Urban Planner is Torontoist’s guide to what’s on in Toronto, published every weekday morning, and in a weekend edition Friday afternoons. If you have an event you’d like considered, email all of its details—as well as images, if you’ve got any—to events@torontoist.com. John Will, But No, 2005, acrylic on canvas, 16 x 20″. Courtesy of [...]