Judah Friedlander teaches an audience member how to breathe, because only he knows the right way. No, seriously.

One of the draws of seeing a comedian live, instead of in a recording or in one of his acting roles, is that you’re getting a unique event, a one-of-a-kind show that won’t be repeated. This is taken to its logical extreme—as was the case at Judah Friedlander’s show at Second City Toronto on Thursday, headlining NBAcomics’ two year anniversary show—when the comedian decides his one goal is to be really funny, in a certain style, but that he is going to pretty much let the audience decide what they want him to make them laugh about. Voila: personalized comedy.

Before we got to all that, the evening’s MC (and NBAcomics founder), David Andrew Brent, opened with a flurry of jokes, impressions, and intense physical comedy. It provided a very energetic opening and a sampler of many of the styles of comedy the audience would experience throughout the the show: shocking, cringe-worthy, self-mocking, or just regular-droll. Matt O’Brien then put in a very funny, tight set, capped by an impression of his father getting out of a parking ticket, managing to slay the audience with the constantly repeated use of one (perfectly clean) word.

Judah Friedlander talks to his audience:

JUDAH FRIEDLANDER: I don’t know, I think Canadians are pretty similar to Americans… maybe Canadians are a bit nicer, a bit more polite.

WOMAN: I think Americans are a lot nicer!

JF: Yeah I wonder why. ‘Hey, I just said Americans are way nicer and then this big room of Canadians turned against me. They’re not very nice.’ Maybe that wasn’t too smart. Think we figured out that problem, huh.

Rick and Chuck (two ostensibly 13-year-old rappers played by Jay Wells L’Ecuyer and Eytan Millstone of local troupe THE BOOM) were up next, joined by Dan Galea, and we can’t really decide where they fall on the spectrum between music and comedy; their X-plus-rated rhymes set to hard beats elicit shocked laughter from the audience at the end of most lines, but often so do those of Eminem. What’s clear is that despite operating in some non-ideal acoustic conditions, and material that would polarize at the best of times, they manage to get the audience roaring, and clearly aren’t skilled only on the comedic side—their verbal gymnastics and graphically creative metaphors take a sketch idea into the realm of full-fledged songs, and may even be where their biggest potential lies. The last man to speak before Friedlander came onstage, comedian and show co-producer Rob Mailloux, had an autobiographical set that gave the World Champion a run for his money in the race for the most creative line of the night: “Don’t worry, I know. I look like a Create-a-Player in NHL ’96.”
To a loud round of applause, Friedlander then shuffled out slowly (ambled? strolled? you get the idea), sporting an acknowledged “Canadian tuxedo” of denim jacket and jeans. Known for his ever-changing hat slogans, he was wearing a rare wordless one, decorated with many small jewels. Only when a puzzled audience member couldn’t bear wondering anymore and begged to know about it did he later reveal the secret: it spells “World Champion” in Braille. The funniest thing about that to us was the idea that he might well have just carried through the whole show with that as his own private joke, if nobody had asked him.

JF: Those people at your table, are they your friends?

MAN: Yeah. Best friends.

JF: Uh, okay…

MAN: I help them out through the bad times and the good times.

JF: …why would you need to help someone through good times, dude? ‘Things seem really great for you right now. I’m just gonna make them a bit worse, okay? Balance things out.’

But ask him they did—dozens of things. Friedlander centred the show around a constant open-call for questions from the audience, with jokes and observations tossed out whenever the audience was stuck for queries. This improv format made a chunk of his lines a surprise even to longtime followers of his act; at times both we and he were simultaneously finding out how the World Champion might respond to a given question about iPhones, the five senses, or Taco Bell. All queries were answered with a lackadaisical assurance that his response was, by definition, completely right: “What do you do, ma’am?” “I’m a social worker.” “So what’s that, you run Facebook? That’s cool, that’s pretty cool. Congratulations,” he nodded, moving calmly on before she could protest.

Only one audience member took (way) too much licence with this format; on the whole it created a fun vibe in which, with the house lights revealing everybody, the whole audience felt involved in helping Friedlander create the show for them (including your Torontoist photographer, who was asked more than once in reaction to a bit, “What do you think of that, photographer? Cool. You’re doin’ a good job”). Responses to the biggest of questions (“Would you make gay marriage legal or illegal?” “Mandatory. If you want to marry a woman you have to sleep with a dude first. Then she knows you’re taking this thing seriously”) and the smallest of questions (“Judah, what’s up?!” “[shrug] …bein’ cool”) were welcomed and answered, with funny quips that were somehow simultaneously quick and lethargic.

In a nuanced evaluation of public policy, the World Champion offered to sit on Stephen Harper’s head and fart until he quit.

It wasn’t the audience’s show, of course, and it wasn’t some haphazard, unprepared thing—jokes he had at the ready hit as well, and included probably our favourite bit about a panic room in his house—for the criminals to hide in once they break into his home and realize what a mistake they made messing with the World Champion. He also blended his jokes—”If I’m elected President of North America, first thing I’ll do, I’m gonna move Hawaii to Lake Ontario”—with quick callbacks in later answers—”Canada’s too cold! Fix it!” “… dude, I’m moving Hawaii to Lake Ontario. So I wouldn’t worry about it.”

MAN: How do you know that?

JF: ‘Cause I’m the World Champion!

MAN: Oh, right.

(A beat.)

JF: Look at my jacket, dude. Does it say ‘Regional Semi-Finalist’?

It’s tempting to keep cramming in jokes we heard, but that’s the nature of the show—never was a serious word said, and the audience was always engaged, lulled into his vibe of constant hyperbole and interaction. After a week of dealing with Judah Friedlander even we’re not quite sure what’s true and false anymore, but we’re sure he’d be glad to tell you. Maybe you can follow him on Twitter, since, as he says, “I’ve had an account since 1985,” before summing up his thoughts on it, and our thoughts on his comedy. “Yeah, it’s pretty fun, dude.”

Photos by Corbin Smith/Torontoist.

Photo courtesy of Judah Friedlander’s Facebook page, which he wants you to know has exceeded its friend limit.

How well do you know Judah Friedlander?
It’s no easy thing, to fully acquaint yourself with a man who describes himself as the World Champion of the World, and vows to somehow answer even more questions than we can ask him during our interview. But we did our best to learn some new things about the 30 Rock star and stand-up comedian, who arrives in Toronto tomorrow to perform at Second City as part of NBA Comics’ two-year anniversary show. For instance, he has some other stuff on his agenda while he’s in town.

“One of the reasons I’m going to Toronto is to give some karate lessons to the border patrol, as well as the customs people,” he points out. “That’s one thing I’m doing on the side while I’m there.”
It’s tough to say which part of his own career he does “on the side.” Recognizable to many for his portrayal of petulant writer and thorn-in-Liz-Lemon’s-side Frank Rossitano on 30 Rock, Friedlander has also had prominent roles in critically lauded films like The Wrestler and American Splendor, and a memorable cameo in the 2000-hit Meet the Parents (“…you can get a whole bunch of Mumm’s”). In addition to acting on film and TV, he also found time last year to write his first book, How to Beat Up Anybody: An Instructional and Inspirational Karate Book by the World Champion. Still, for Friedlander, all of these projects take a back seat to stand-up comedy.

Judah Friedlander on how he compares with his 30 Rock character, Frank Rossitano:

“He doesn’t dress quite as well as the World Champion, and he’s not in as good shape as the World Champion. But he tries really hard, and he does pretty well for himself.”

“The way I envision the Frank character is that Liz Lemon never likes the sketches that I come up with and write myself, because they’re too guy-oriented, or they’re too sexist, or they’re too sci-fi-oriented. It’s not like he’s the kinda guy who you’d really… hire to… do writing on a sketch show that’s mostly geared toward women?”

“I’ve been doing stand-up since ’89. That’s number one for me; it always has been,” he says. With the Emmy-winning 30 Rock currently on break from filming, he’s doing a lot more of it, but even during shooting he performs “several nights a week.” As with a lot of the World Champion’s stories, we buy that part, and you can definitely tell he means it when he says how important stand-up comedy is to him. From there, you’re on your own as to where the truth begins and ends.
“I got drafted outta high school, right into the pros,” he says, recounting the origins of his involvement with stand-up comedy. “I was ripping on some teachers at the school and the whole school was laughin’. Before you know it the laughter was so loud that there was a comedy scout drivin’ by on a highway several miles away, heard all the laughter, then he came over and I just got drafted.”
We’re well into our next question before he decides that story hadn’t quite peaked. He adds: “They actually just shut the school down and they just turned it into a comedy club, and that was the first place I ever performed.”

On the environment:

“I think it all comes down to green energy. Let’s face it. That’s why I’m running from New York to Toronto for my show. I’m racing a plane. Oh, it’ll be cool, dude. It won’t be a problem.”

After speaking with Judah Friedlander for 30 minutes, we can’t even be sure this photo has been digitally altered.

Time and again during our conversation he would, after a few beats, offer an extra fact or elaboration, as if trying (often successfully) to cause the next question to break up into laughter. This included letting us know, just for extra context, that throughout the whole interview he had been “actually beating up three guys. Just so you know.” It was something we apparently hadn’t been able to hear because of his “silencer shoes.”
His desire to keep us apprised of the facts like that betrays a generosity (also present in always reminding us, to our relief, when we’ve asked an “excellent question”) that apparently carries over to his act as well. He describes his responsibility when onstage as “to make them laugh harder and more than they have ever laughed. That is my job.” For Friedlander stand up is a simple, direct thing, without some deep message: “I’m not teaching a class. It’s pure escapism comedy.”

On what constitutes a slow day for Judah Friedlander:

“Only hookin’ up with 20 chicks, you know? Only solving 14 crimes.”

It’s an art of boastful imagination that he’s pretty much mastered, and it enables him to talk about just about any subject he wants. This includes his plan to head to space pretty soon to check out the moon landing for himself (“It’s just kinda dusty, you know. I think I would have to go up there and just sweep for a while”); his authorial technique (“Most of the book I wrote underwater”); and his opinion on the superpowers of flight vs. invisibility (“Well, I have both. And flight is a lot cooler.”)
After a conversation discussing all that, plus his thwarted attempts to romance an elephant, I’m still not sure if I know Judah Friedlander. But he’s pretty funny that way.

The lyrics to the theme song are “Doctor Whooooooo, Doctor Whooooooooo. Doctor, Doctor, Doctor Doctor Whoooooooo, ooooooooo.” Illustration by Brett Lamb/Torontoist.

Monday

ROYAL WEDDING FEVER! A very special edition of 20/20 is aaaaalllllll about Prince William and Kate Middleton, and how they met and fell in love and will get married thanks to the generosity of the British taxpayer. Baba Wawa will show us exclusive home movies and photographs that you cannot see anywhere else! Until somebody makes a DVD and gets the rights to them. Then you can buy that DVD, we suppose. But until then, if you want to know what Kate’s girlhood chums think about Wills, this is your best option! (ABC, 10 p.m.)

Tuesday

So the second season of Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution is, if anything, more depressing than the first, because in the first season Oliver was at least able to have some small success in Huntington, West Virginia. This season, however, he is in Los Angeles and is up against bigger bureaucracies and people who have to compete against McDonald’s economy of scale, and basically the whole enterprise seems five times as hopeless as West Virginia. There, he just had to deal with white people who were wearing T-shirts with things on them like STEAKS ARE MY LIFE and GIVE ME FRIED FOOD OR GIVE ME DEATH, and who thought anybody suggesting “maybe you should eat a salad” was probably a Communist. (ABC, 8 p.m.)
The Simpsons rerun of the week: “HOMR,” wherein Homer becomes smarter when doctors remove a crayon wedged in his brain. “Family meeting. Family meeting… okay, people, let’s keep this short. We all want to get home to our families! All right, first item: I lost our life savings in the stock market. Now let’s move on to the real issue: Lisa’s hogging of the maple syrup.” (CFMT, 6:30 p.m.)

Wednesday

Tonight, on The Agenda With Steve Paikin, Steve explores how the Japanese economy will (or will not) rebound after the earthquakes, tidal waves, nuclear meltdowns, and whatever the hell happens to Japan next. Disaster economics! Only on TVO! (8 p.m.)
You know what? Ocean’s Eleven holds up a decade later, and we don’t see that changing any time soon: it’s a quintessentially great heist caper flick that appears to be largely timeless. My favourite bit: whenever Scott Caan and Casey Affleck argue with one another about stupid crap. Never stops being funny. (CHCH, 8 p.m.)

Thursday

30 Rock celebrates its 100th episode with an hour-long two-parter, wherein Liz Lemon must get the show to be “not the worst show on television” for a night. Also, the show plans to parody clip-show flashbacks quite extensively, which is always good fun and the sort of metahumour 30 Rock does best. Also, there will be a dancing bear. Well, maybe there won’t be a dancing bear. But there should be a dancing bear. Who doesn’t like dancing bears? Memo to self: include “dancing bear” idea in next anonymous fan letter spelled out with newspaper cutout letters to Tina Fey. (City, 10 p.m.)
The Paul Reiser Show wants to be a PG version of Curb Your Enthusiasm. We’ll just let that sink in for a moment there while you think about whether or not you want to watch this now. (NBC, 8:30 p.m.)
With the initial eliminations done, America’s Best Dance Crew now features all eight remaining crews competing in a single show. This season’s “superstars” gimmick (where each week is themed after a different performing artist) wasn’t too bad the first two weeks, when the crews danced to remixes of Lil Wayne and Ke$ha, but unfortunately this week is the Black Eyed Peas week, and…well. “Oh dear” doesn’t quite seem to explain the apprehension that the Black Eyed Peas generate. What’s worse is that two of the Black Eyed Peas (the ones that are not Will.I.Am and Fergie) are themselves primarily dancers, so maybe they’ll give advice about dancing as well. Oh dear, indeed. (MuchMusic, 10 p.m.)

Friday

20/20 has not one but two special episodes this week, as tonight Walters interviews Elton John and David Furnish, and perhaps Elton John will make up his mind about whether gay marriage is important, considering he was first against it (“gay people can have civil partnerships”), and then for it, calling for the repeal of California’s Prop 8 earlier this year. Make up your damn mind, Crocodile Rock. (ABC, 10 p.m.)

The Weekend

Some people might suggest that Televisualist is biased in favour of Doctor Who, but those people are probably all salad-eating Commies who hate everything that is good about Western civilization, so there. Tonight, Space actually has the season premiere—featuring the first Doctor Who episode shot and set in the United States—airing on the same actual day as it debuts in Britain and the U.S.! We have international synchronicity going on here, people! (8 p.m. Saturday)
Beyond the Blackboard is a made-for-TV movie about a teacher who teaches homeless kids in New Mexico. It reunites Emily VanCamp and Treat Williams from Everwood. We’re not sure if anybody reading this is going to say, “Oh, yes, I simply must watch that,” but if there is a large group of old Everwood fans secretly reading this column, then we’ve covered you. (9 p.m. Sunday)
Treme returns for a second season, and although John Goodman won’t be returning this year, Melissa Leo will, and how often do you get to watch a television show starring someone who literally just won an Oscar? Also Treme is really, really good and you should watch it. (HBO Canada, 10 p.m. Sunday)

Steve Buscemi learns where he comes from on Who do You Think You Are? Illustration by Brett Lamb/Torontoist.

Monday
This week, a new episode of How I Met Your Mother, which wouldn’t normally get us too excited except it’s a Barney-oriented ep, and since Neil Patrick Harris is far and away the best thing about this show it’s probably worth seeing. It’s followed by something called Mad Love, another Friends-spawned abomination about white people having sex with each other in New York City. (CBS, 8:00 p.m.)
This week on Two and a Half Men, Alan gets upset when Charlie brings home a Hefty bag full of cocaine and teaches Jake how to sniff it off a porn star’s ass. Sorry, that’s made up, there is no new Two and a Half Men this week and probably never will be again. However, fans of the Sheen oeuvre unsatisfied with his online crazy-cast and unmoved by his history of violence can console themselves with the fact that if you’ve got a TV, you’ve got Two and a Half Men: now, forever, and always. Winning!
ABC brings back the four-millionth iteration of Dancing With the Stars, an opportunity to watch some mediocre dancing while reflecting on how dangerously diluted the celebrity pool has become. The latest cast includes the original (and still the best!) Karate Kid, as well as Kirstie Alley and some people you’ll have to Google. (ABC, 8 p.m.)
Tuesday
Tonight on the The Biggest Loser, a group of morbidly obese people will be bullied, hectored, and humiliated into the kind of transformation that makes good TV. Trainer/dominatrix Jillian will explain why one of the contestants needs to be pushed to the point of collapse, but will not admit that she enjoys it. (NBC, 8 p.m.)
And on Glee, a rerun of the Gwyneth Paltrow stunt-casting episode. (Fox, 8 p.m.)
Wednesday
We’re all about sitcoms this week, and there’s a new episode of the often amusing Modern Family (CFTO/ABC 8 p.m.), followed by the vastly less amusing Mr. Sunshine. It’s like surgeons removed the section of Matthew Perry’s brain where he kept the comic timing and replaced it with cotton balls and irritability. (CTV/ABC 8:30 p.m.)
This week on American Idol, the group is winnowed down to the top ten contestants, who will be ensured a place in future tours of state fairs and Indian casinos. Even on a show where the mediocrity dial normally goes to eleven and beyond, this year’s crop of popsters is an unusually talentless bunch. Paula Abdul must be spinning in her grave. (CTV/Fox, 8 p.m.)
The always classy Spike features a seven and a half–hour marathon of 1000 Ways to Die, comic-creepy true stories about people who’ve died in unusual and entertaining ways, like drinking gasoline or suffocating from their own farts. It starts at 3 p.m. so you’ll have to leave work early.
Thursday
Wipeout is the ultimate brain-deadening comfort TV. It’s like sitting in a bathtub full of warm mashed potatoes and Jim Beam, and that’s not such a bad thing. (Global/ABC 8 p.m.)
Tonight, whoever got voted off American Idol last night gets revealed, and is dragged crying and wailing back to their rightful obscurity a few weeks before the rest of the crew. (CTV/Fox 8 p.m.).
Finally an all-new sitcom lineup on NBC, including Community, Parks and Recreation, and 30 Rock, all of which are pretty solid even when they’re bad. (8:00 p.m. onward)
Friday
Foul-mouthed chef Gordon Ramsay plagues some more incompetent restaurateurs in a new Kitchen Nightmares. If you’ve never seen the show, it goes like this: Ramsay shows up at a failing foodery, spits its specialty out into a napkin, and says it makes him want to puke. Next he identifies all the problems in the place and is met with resistance by the owner, leading to a bleeped-out shoutfest and to the disbeliever walking out onto a dark street. A new menu is introduced, an opening night crisis is barely averted, and the owner returns, now convinced of Ramsay’s wisdom. Bam—transformation! (Global/Fox 8 p.m)
Who Do You Think You Are is where celebrities explore their roots. This week Steve Buscemi traces his family tree, and the episode description notes that he “discovers a questionable character among his ancestors.” Seriously, just one? (City/NBC 8 p.m.)
The Weekend
Saturday: if you haven’t seen Owning Mahowny yet, do yourself a favour and watch it. Based on a true story, the movie features a standout performance from Philip Seymour Hoffman as a Canadian bank manager who embezzles millions of dollars to fund his gambling addiction. Apart from Hoffman (who even manages to capture the Canadian pronunciation of “out” that Americans never get), there’s a great supporting cast and an excellent script. For anyone who remembers Toronto in the 80s, the locally shot scenes are also a great trip down memory lane. (City 9 p.m.)
Dancing With the Stars is on again, so if you missed Ralph Macchio and that reality lady with the sex tape, you have another chance. It was so much better when TV shows were only aired once a week. (ABC 8 p.m.)
Sunday is the popular The Amazing Race: Unfinished Business, which sounds slightly sinister to us—like a followup to Mein Kampf—but is really quite harmless if you don’t mind frustrated Americans yelling at uncomprehending foreigners. (ABC 8 p.m.)
Finally, Sunday also brings us the 40th annual Juno Awards, a.k.a. the Maple Leaf Grammys. Features lots of famous Canucks, including Hedley, Broken Social Scene, and Arcade Fire slumming it at home after big wins abroad.
Christopher Bird will return to Televisualist next week.

Coming soon to A&E: “Turkey: Dinnertime.” Illustration by Brett Lamb/Torontoist.

Monday

How I Met Your Mother has thus far been having an especially strong start to the season, mostly because the show finally seems set to introduce Ted’s future wife this season at an upcoming wedding (Barney’s? Robin’s? Barney and Robin’s? Who knows). Anyway, tonight’s episode is called “Subway Wars,” and will most likely not feature any Toronto mayoral candidates. If we’re lucky. Rob Ford probably wouldn’t make a good cameo because he’d start complaining about how much the set costs and about the lack of fanservice. (City, 8 p.m.)
Chuck‘s ratings so far this season have been… not great. Actually, “not great” is probably upselling it a bit. They’re worse than they have been in previous years, and previous years were never good. The show isn’t just flirting with cancellation, it’s taking it out to dinner and getting it drunk. All of this is to say that if you enjoy Chuck, enjoy it while you can. (NBC, 8 p.m.)
Re-Vamped is a sort of non-competitive reality show where women who have gotten dumped go through a series of tough “challenges” to empower themselves and get on with their lives, culminating in a final-episode burlesque performance. The show means well, but it feels uneven; it concentrates a bit too much on the challenges, which might be cathartic but are also ultimately, in the sense of the narrative the show seeks to build, kind of meaningless. You can’t have drama of the sort the show wants to build around the challenges without some sort of consequence, and that’s lacking. A nice experiment, though. (Slice, 2 p.m.)

Tuesday

Speaking of “not long for this world,” Parker/Spitzer is a horrible, horrible news discussion show, just like pretty much every other newstalk show CNN puts together these days, but this one is especially a trainwreck. Watch it once, to see how bad it is. Then never again. (8 p.m.)
The Little Couple is a reality show about newlyweds who are also little people. We have said all we need to say about this show. Either you’re interested in watching that or you aren’t. Personally, for us, the whole “little person in a big world” aspect gets repetitive after two or three episodes because the show really doesn’t frame that aspect of their lives well. (TLC, 10 p.m.)

Wednesday

Steven Seagal: Lawman is wonderful amazing trash reality teevee of the most spectacular kind. Seeing Steven Seagal be a cop sort of for reals is just insanely nuts. Seeing the people he arrests be amazed in a “whoa I am getting arrested by Steven Seagal” sort of way is even nuttier. The fact that this show is on A&E (which precedes it with Dog the Bounty Hunter) is nutty in ways we cannot adequately explain. And the fact that civic authorities actually decided this was a good idea is nuttiest of all. And yet, the show is entertaining, in a “hey,what’s that going down the drain, oh right it’s civilization” kind of way. At least there aren’t any ads for Steven Seagal’s personally branded energy drink. (10 p.m.)
The Food Network is airing Chopped about a month and a half after it aired in the U.S. (insert usual rant about Canadian networks airing shows after the fact in the internet age here), but the fifty-thousand-dollar challenge, bringing back past winners, is an especially good iteration of this particular competitive cooking game show. Part of the charm of Chopped is that, unlike a Top Chef or Hell’s Kitchen, you get your entire competitive fix in one episode: they compete, somebody wins the money, and then the next episode gives you a whole new fix. It’s single-serving television, if you will pardon the pun. (10 p.m.)

Thursday

This week on The Nature of Things: an entire hour of elephants and humans being friends! Because they apparently said “you know, people aren’t happy enough these days. Let’s show them elephants and humans being friends.” Works for us. (CBC, 8 p.m.)
30 Rock is live this week. I honestly have no idea how the show will pull off a live episode, given how reliant it often is on quick cut gags and camera tricks to get laughs, but you have to admire their balls. (City, 8:30 p.m.)

Friday

Just in case letting Steven Seagal pretend to be a police officer wasn’t enough, now A&E lets Tony Danza pretend to be a teacher in Tony Danza: Teach. Well, honestly, that’s not entirely fair to Danza, who actually has a degree in history, as opposed to Seagal, who claims he went through police training at some point in the distant past before the dog ate all his documentation. But watching Danza fumble through the job of being a high school teacher isn’t funny and awesome, like Lawman is. It’s just kind of depressing. (10 p.m.)
The Simpsons rerun of the week: “The Itchy and Scratchy and Poochie Show,” which gave nerds the word “Poochie” as a term for a theoretically cool character forced down the throats of a program’s fans. “No, Homer. Very few cartoons are broadcast live. It’s a terrible strain on the animators’ wrists.” (Fox, 11 p.m.)

The Weekend

X2: X-Men United, a.k.a. “the X-Men movie that’s really good,” is on. Because you want to see Hugh Jackman claw people with claws, and see Ian McKellen be stone-cold badass, and see Patrick Stewart fall out of a wheelchair several times. (A-Channel, 8 p.m.)