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Real City Matters

Join us for a series of panel discussions about the state of our city, and how we can have more honest, constructive conversations about its future.

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culture

Televisualist: “Want to Know What’s Gay? Go to www.whatisgay.biz”

Each week, Torontoist examines the upcoming TV listings and makes note of programs that are entertaining, informative, and of quality. Or, alternately, none of those. The result: Televisualist.

Eliza Coupe from Happy Endings explains things helpfully to you with her trademark death stare.

Monday

Junk Raiders‘ third season premieres on Discovery. This show has always been fun, hitting that pleasant middle ground between Junkyard Wars‘ dorky competitiveness and the redesign plots from various homemaker shows. Sure, a lot of things that get made on this show aren’t exactly the most practical ideas in the world (the bicycle-driven computer, for example), but they’re fun. And, really, from the viewer’s perspective, isn’t that the most important thing? Yes. Yes it is. (9 p.m.)


Tuesday

Emily Owens, M.D. features Mamie Gummer (all-time winner of the “Most Impressive Combination of Excellent Screen Presence With Awful-Sounding Name” award) as a young, socially awkward doctor-in-training who constantly engages in internal monologues with herself. “Sounds like Scrubs,” you say, but this is an hour long, not as funny/more serious (no fun imagination sequences in this doctor show!), and has a not-as-good-as-it-thinks idea about how hospitals are just like high school. The pilot is okay but not great. Mostly, this is a show that reminds you that Scrubs was at times a truly great show. (CTV2, 9 p.m.)

Oh hey, it’s the second presidential debate! After a veep debate wherein Joe Biden absolutely crushed Paul Ryan and showed him to be a whimpering little simp (the media decided this was “rude” because when Mitt Romney does it, that’s presidential, but when Biden does it, something something whatever), all eyes (okay, some eyes) are on this, the “town hall” debate, where ordinary citizens ask the candidates questions! Ostensibly, this is a chance for regular Joes and Janes to toss the candidates curve balls. Realistically, it is a chance for Mitt Romney to lie his ass off even more, and if Barack Obama points out that Mitt Romney is full of shit, then he will be called “rude.” (American major networks, CNN, and Newsworld, 9 p.m.)

Extreme Cheapskates is a show about people who find ways to stretch their money further. Like this guy, who rewashes his paper towels so he can reuse them, getting three to five uses out of every sheet of paper towel! (Apparently, nobody told him about the existence of cloth towels, which can be used far more than three to five times.) It’s only a matter of time before we get Freecycle: The Series, I guess. Welcome to the recession, everybody! (TLC, 10 p.m.)

Underemployed is MTV’s new single-cam dramedy about, well, young people trying to get by, at ages when underemployment is still charming rather than terrifying. It’s not bad, but somewhere out there someone’s working on a show about underemployed thirtysomethings, which we will call “unfortunately, all too often the real world,” and that show will win lots of awards and/or be cancelled after one season. (10 p.m.)


Wednesday

Suburgatory returns, and although we like the show, the only thing we are wondering about is if it will continue to be viewable as a portrayal of a weirdly engaging father-daughter romance. Because it totally works like that. Watch a few episodes and tell us we’re wrong. Hint: we are not wrong. (City, 8:30 p.m.)

Last season, Recipe to Riches brought us a show nobody watched and a bunch of President’s Choice items in the supermarket, most of which we tried. (The lemon pudding cakes were the only ones we liked.) But it was successful, so let’s do it all again! (Food Channel, 9 p.m.)

Alert for Gordon Ramsay fans who aren’t satisfied by the 7,000 Gordon Ramsay shows on television already: Gordon Behind Bars is your standard “Gordon Ramsay challenges people to cook food” show, but this time the people he is challenging are inmates in a prison, so presumably he will have to be more polite than normal. The show is not called Gordon Gets Shanked, after all. (Food Channel, 10 p.m.)


Thursday

Hey, The Nature of Things is back! Tonight’s episode, “The Buffalo Wolves,” is about buffalo and wolves. That’s it. No jokes. Buffalo and wolves. You either are tempted to watch this now, or you aren’t. Personally, we think buffalo and wolves are kind of awesome. (CBC, 8 p.m.)

The Simpsons rerun of the week: “Treehouse of Horror VI,” which is the one with the 3D segment. “This place looks expensive. I feel like I’m wasting a fortune just standing here.” (Comedy Network, 8:30 p.m.)


Friday

Nikita returns for a third season, and although we don’t watch the show regularly, we love Maggie Q deeply, so we’re glad she continues to get work. Maggie Q is really good at assassinating the baddies on television, you see. (CTV2, 9 p.m.)


The Weekend

Although we were jazzed when 30 Rock and Parks and Recreation came back, and we are anxious for Community‘s new season, the sitcom return we’ve most eagerly awaited this fall is Happy Endings, which is simply the funniest show on television, period, end of story, no discussion, nyet, nada, no sir, DONE. It comes back NOW. That is all you need to know. (City, 8:30 Sunday)

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