Scale Model City, Actual-Size Grime

By Steve Kupferman

There’s a scale model of downtown Toronto off to the side of the busy first-floor rotunda at City Hall, right in the path of visitors. It’s massive and meticulously detailed. It’s a nice tribute to the city. And, we were reminded when an anonymous tip landed in our inbox, it’s rarely cleaned.
The model is surrounded by a low glass barrier, but is not protected on top, making it easy for foreign objects to fall inside. The result, as you can see in the photos accompanying this article (taken Friday afternoon), is that Tiny Toronto is overrun with drifts of dust and lint big enough to stop a miniature snowplow dead in its tracks.
The dust has clearly had some time to accumulate, but the brown beverage stains, according to our tipster, are fresh. Only forensic analysis would be able confirm this, but we believe the particular shade of brown exhibited there on the roof of Rogers Centre is consistent with a Tim Horton’s double-double.
The way this model is situated in the rotunda, it’s almost guaranteed to be seen by anyone who visits City Hall on business: it’s right at the end of a long corridor of service counters, and it’s located just to the left of the main entrance. The model is, admittedly, very large and probably difficult to clean (there’s nowhere, really, for a person to stand or kneel inside the model case without crushing lots of little buildings), but just looking at this thing is enough to make a person itch.
Which mayoral candidate will have the bravery and fortitude to say “no” to dust and coffee stains, and “yes” to a few hours with a damp rag and a bottle of Mr. Clean?
Photos by Joel Charlebois/Torontoist.