By André Bovee-Begun

Here’s a nice quick Newsstand for today, because, take our word for it, you’re going to want to keep an eye on the onrushing current of this news day as it proceeds. So let’s get you up to speed and turn you loose, okay?
So, why all the rush? Well, as we stayed up way past curfew to report last night, a certain mayor is making a big announcement this morning, and we’re practically beside ourselves keeping up with all the speculation. As of now, we can’t say anymore than we already have, but the chatter is that David Miller may be bowing out of the 2010 mayoral race, which at this juncture would appear to mean virtually conceding to front-runners George Smitherman or John Tory. Is he? Isn’t he? Torontoist is all over this story, and we’re using our fabulous Internet powers to provide you updates as soon as the Miller breaks the silence at 10 this morning, so just pop by and keep hitting refresh until either news or candy comes out. (Signs, in case we haven’t made that clear, point to “news.”)
Okay, here goes.
Um…wait. When Toronto said we had $249 million in sick-day liability, we secretly meant almost half a billion dollars? And—hang on—when City Council voted on a labour contract during the strike, they were given a $140 million dollar figure for the striking workers? Annnd, city staffers knew about this…in March? And, City Council would have been informed of the little error earlier, except that the strike got in the way? Well, that can’t possibly be right, right?
O—kay: true genuine fact: William “The Renaissance” Thorsell is getting out of the ROM business after ten long years. During the Thorsell epoch, the cost of admission to the museum more than doubled, and Free Fridays went the way of these guys. That’s not to say that Thorsell’s tenure as top ROM guy was monotonously negative. “High-profile” sums up his vision for the museum, which crystallized over the last decade and will reach its end in…about ten months. Sigh. So, bye, Bill.
Umm, teachers? If you’re listening? Your pension fund is $2.5 billion dollars short, and that nasty number could jump to $22 billion over the next two years. It’s a little hard to believe retirement from the TDSB has undone so many, but there you go. We’re going to say it one more time: they lost $19.5 billion dollars this year.
Hey look, Iggy says the Conservative government is paying out the oh-so-important stimulus money at a snail’s pace, and that they’re giving 15% more funding to its own ridings. And he’s got a point, but only to the extent that it’s mathematically true. But that’s still no excuse for dissing small-town and city governments, which is what federal minister John Baird says the Libs’s “shameful” complaint boils down to. I know two parliamentarians who’re off each others’ Christmas card list.
Why Would Jesus Busk? This story is worth looking at for the photo alone. And finally, who steals bronze nameplates off of gravestones? Guys, it’s not even copper! Seriously, though, what is that?