By Patrick Metzger

Happy Simcoe Day, formerly known as the Civic Holiday until the powers-that-be decided it would be more more festive to name your undeserved day off after an English man than a Japanese car. Malls and liquor stores are open, banks and Canada Post are closed, so you can get drunk but you can’t get mail.
Last night saw a spate of violent crime—or in the words of the Sun headline, “bloody mayhem”—with three knife attacks and a shooting taking place in the space of a few hours. Police are also investigating three homicides that took place over the weekend. Today’s forecast calls for sunshine with only a slight chance of mayhem.
The man accused of hacking off a fellow passenger’s head on a Greyhound bus last week has yet to speak to investigators and is presently on suicide watch in Winnipeg. It’s also reported that Vince Li has his handcuffs and shackles checked when he’s moved as “it’s believed he’s a flight risk.” Seriously, that’s what they said.
A study out of the US has found that kid’s meals at chain restaurants contain an unhealthy number of calories. An official at the Center for Science in the Public Interest said that “parents want to feed their children healthy meals, but America’s chain restaurants are setting parents up to fail,” presumably because fast food chains now come to American homes and force-feed kids cheeseburgers and fried chicken.
Photo by Wanda G.