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GM Slashes Jobs, UN Tackles Food Prices, Magic Boots Raptors

General Motors cut 900 jobs in Oshawa yesterday, mostly related to the production of oversized trucks and sport-utility vehicles. A spokesperson for the CAW angrily called upon for the Canadian government to “discover more oil somewhere so these jobs can remain relevant.”
The United Nations formed a task force today to tackle the global food crisis. Oh, well, now that the United Nations is involved in the global food crisis, all our problems are over!
In related news, though food prices worldwide have risen sharply, in Ontario they have not, thanks largely to food prices remaining steady at the Ontario Food Terminal. In other related news, wait a week or two.
In a shocking development, people are not horribly sympathetic towards TTC workers. “I don’t understand,” said TTC union chief Bob Kinnear. “All our data showed that people would like a flash strike on Friday evening with no advance warning. What went wrong?”
And sadly, the Orlando Magic knocked the Raptors out of the playoffs, so now we have to wait an entire year for Toronto teams to fail miserably in the post-season again. (The Blue Jays will not make the post-season, so they don’t count.)
Photo by Matt Phillips.


  • Mark Ostler

    Perhaps if terminator seeds were completely eradicated, the reckless herbicidal spraying of agricultural land in South America (to kill the coca plant) were stopped, suburban sprawl ceased to exist and sufficient subsidies were paid to farmers, then we’d have chance at ending global food shortages.

  • rek

    Don’t forget turning entire nations over to growing biofuel instead of crops they can eat…

  • WannaBinToranna

    “King Corn” on Independent Lens on PBS. Will change the way you eat and look at food.

  • Chris Taylor

    I like how CUPE is threatening further labour unrest if Toronto City Council decides to slap the “essential service” label on the TTC.
    Yup, that will definitely get the public on-side. Smoooooooth.