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news

Free Turkey Giveaway A Huge Success, And All The Rest Of The News Today Is Just Depressing, Really

By Christopher Bird

hiddenturkey.jpg
Honest Ed’s turkey giveaway successful like always. Which, Torontoist supposes, is not technically “news,” but considering the rest of today’s actual news, we felt it appropriate to lead off with a softball.
Canada to encourage “constructive” emissions agreement at the Bali climate change summit. Since this is John Baird we’re talking about here, expect “constructive” to mean something along the lines of “voluntary,” or perhaps “nonexistent.”
16-year-old gunned down in doorway of his home. Police are investigating the death of Keyon Campbell and will be accepting any and all information. His death marks Toronto’s 80th homicide this year.
Stéphane Dion advises party members to be prepared for an election in the new year. According to his speech, the Liberal Party will find its balls “real soon now,” but only when it is convenient.
Vladimir Putin’s United Russia party sweeps Russian elections. After the vote totals were announced, Putin sat back in a darkened room with a large snifter of brandy and saluted evil.
Spice Girls kick off reunion tour. Many headlines will involve the lyric “tell me what you want / what you really really want,” but unfortunately none of them will answer that with “stop right now / thank you very much.”
Photo by Samer Farha from the Torontoist Flickr Pool.

Comments

  • McKingford

    Canada to encourage “constructive” emissions agreement at the Bali climate change summit. Since this is John Baird we’re talking about here, expect “constructive” to mean something along the lines of “voluntary,” or perhaps “nonexistent.”
    In the context of climate change and carbon emissions, whenever you hear the words “aspirational”, “voluntary”, “constructive”, and “intensity”, you know that they are total bullshit, and will accomplish nothing to fight climate change.
    How sad, then, that “Canada’s New Government” is the organ most responsible for either creating or supporting these terms…

  • matty

    Didn’t Canada drop out of Kyoto?

  • thestarkcontrast

    No, Canada’s still in Kyoto – we’re just ignoring its plan, goals and targets.
    On a different note, while Vladimir Putin might look like a James Bond villain (and occasionally act like one) to characterize him as such is probably not so helpful.

  • catalyst

    what i find interesting about the conservative party is that they merge the two things they typically dont know how to deal with in their party,a gay man and the environment minister position,i guess in their minds, freaks on the left eh!.