By Patrick Metzger

The above cryptic cooler was spotted parked in the middle of the sidewalk in a quiet North Toronto neigbourhood early one morning this week. There were no apparent construction sites within easy cooler-toting distance.
The cooler raises a variety of questions such as: “How did this thing get here?”, “Specimen of what?” “Under what circumstances would I be expected to call the 1-800 number provided?” “Why can’t I move it and what would happen if I did?” and of course “Why is there a Dead Kennedys logo spray-painted on the lid?”
Torontoist chose to follow the instructions given and leave the thing alone. A subsequent walk along the same route found that the cooler had vanished as mysteriously as it had arrived, presumably retrieved by DBA Engineering or the mad scientist who had left it there in the first place.
Readers with insight into the meaning and implications of this event are invited to weigh in.