By Sarah Lazarovic

‘What the heck is this blob,’ we wondered, as we made our way past that overpriced sub shop where they ‘toast’ your bread, and gauge your pocketbook. Was it an Italian cigarette? Was it a bouncehouse for one? We were inclined to think it a drink (Isn’t he a tall drink of water?), though we couldn’t quite figure why a sandwich shop would use a generic beverage container as its mascot. Then, we asked the girl handing out coupons next to Mr. Blob what he was. “I don’t know, a beverage maybe,” she said, as she handed us a coupon for one free beverage with purchase of any toasted offering. Even Mr. Blob’s outstretched hands spoke to his confusion. ‘What? Whaddyawant from me? Haven’t you ever seen a guy in a mushy white suit?”